shadow of a doubt | d.m

49

this one's a long chapter so be ready ahah but we're close to the end!!

Devyn's POV-

My whole life i've gone to think; live life to the fullest for you never know what could happen.

To come to think of it, I will never fully be satisfied. There is so much more that I can do, that I could've done. Maybe that's my fault, that I had wasted potential, on pills, weed, alcohol. Threw away a sacrifice my dad made, or Hermione, everyone who fought for me. I tossed it down the drain. I could carry this shamefulness around forever, or at least I did, until now.

Finally I have good reason.

I looked to Draco, it wouldn't be an easy task to talk to him.

But Time was a ticking time bomb.

Was it sick of me to finally feel like I had a purpose. Truly, my life was going towards something I wanted it to, that being for them. Because quite honestly, they saved me from myself, so I am now saving them.

"Frost-I'm serious." Draco inched to me. His hands and feet tied. The rasp of his voice showing through.

"I know...so am I-" I whispered back. Not making eye contact to meet his, that would crush me.

"I'm not letting you fucking do this." He harshly snapped.

To which I spoke- "You don't have a choice."

He tried to resonate with me. His voice using whatever it had left not to crack. But as all good things are, everything must come to an end. And this was just mine.

"Please-" He nudged his finger to touch mine.

"Don't do this to me." His voice broke. Straining through what could be ever known to be tears. Hurts to know this is the first time i've seen him show the sad emotion, under these fucking circumstances.

I breathed hard. My chest rising and falling, staying strong because I had to.

In the end this was my decision. My fall. My end.

"It's me..for all of you." I mumbled back. Surely I knew his act of selfishness couldn't be kept back. He wanted me alive, no matter hat cost for the rest of the group.

"If you do this- I will never fucking forgive you- I mean that. I swear to God you will regret this." He sputtered out. His pleads furiously changing to anger.

"You'll forgive me one day." I snapped back. Keeping strong locked eye contact with the ticking watch Lucius left on the table. 40 minutes left. 40 minutes to say goodbye.

"Now is not the time to be fucking courageous." Draco seemingly yelled, causing Pansy and Blaise to break conversation. They both gazed to Draco, anxiously putting his head flat to hang down.

-You're being selfish. Fucking selfish." The blonde boy finished off. His tone increasing every word he spat.

"Malfoy-" Pansy broke. I could tell she was more on edge then Blaise or Theo. Her small strand of braids that she loved to do so much, were undone. Her ruined mascara drying to her pale cheeks. Never in a million would I thought to see her like this.

The right thing to do would be to acknowledge him, but that would cause a fight. A final fucking fight with us, although it felt like all we did was fight.

"Tell me what you want from me." I felt his presence gleaming straight to my face, watching every expression I twisted.

"I want you to live your life." I muttered back, finally looking up to him. God he was a mess. This is what I was resented. A final glance to the way his iced hair would fall over his forehead, tickling his eyebrows, his defined cheekbones that structured with his jawline. But most of all, his eyes, Jesus Christ I could get lost in them. Swirls of thin grey, with feathers of chilled blue.