I enter my mother's house to her beautiful music playing in the living room.
"How is she today?" I ask Nurse Shelby. She smiles at me.
"No break downs today but she's been sitting at the piano most the day." She says and I thank her before walking into the living room.
"Mom." I greet her, taking a seat next to her. She stops playing and smiles at me.
"My beautiful daughter." She kisses my cheek and takes my hand. "I've missed you so much. Are you on spring break?" She asks.
"Mom, I finished college two years ago." I remind her and she frowns.
"Oh." She says. "How was it?"
"Okay, I guess." I shrug and she laughs at me.
"I loved college." She says and I smile at her.
"I know." I tell her. I know because she always tells me. That's where her and my father met during her sophomore year.
"I've been practicing." She says, pressing a few keys of the piano.
"Yes. Nurse Shelby has told me you've been here." I say to her and she nods. I've been thinking about putting my mother in a nursing home, where she'll be cared for by more than one nurse who's always here. I pay her well but I feel it's better to put her in a home. But I won't mention this to my mother right now as I don't want any outbursts or sudden mood changes. I sit with her a while, listening to her play the pieces she used to play for me as a child. I've learned to play a few simple songs along the years but nothing major except for a few keys in her favorite piece. I help Shelby put her to bed. Shelby leaves me with my mother and I smile down at her.
"I love you, mom. So much." I say to her, holding her hand.
"Oh baby, I love you more. You're my world." She grabs my face and makes me bend down so that she can kiss my forehead. This moment is the best as I lay my head on her chest, she caresses my head as she did when I was a child before going to sleep. I used to alway ask her to rub my head for good dreams but also because it felt good and helped me sleep better. I pick my head up and kiss my mothers forehead before saying goodnight and leaving. I thank Shelby again before leaving the house.
~••~
My mind is piled with thoughts of my previous discussion of a new job, my mother, and the fights. The shower I've just taken helps to relieve the stress that has built up in me. As I'm ready to go to bed, I hear a light knock on my door. I glance at the alarm clock that sits on my nightstand. It's 12:34am. I quickly rush to the door and peep through the hole to see Harry. He's here at midnight. I open the door slowly and stare up at him.
"It's midnight." I say to him, he's in sweats and sneakers and out of breath.
"I know. I'm sorry. I was just running and I..." He trails off, his eyes looking over my body and I look down to see why. I'm only wearing a tank top and a pair of shorts. "Couldn't stop thinking about you." He finishes. I look up at him again and gulp. His eyes seem to grow darker. He walks into the apartment and I don't know what to do. Like every other time I'm with him, I don't know what to do. He shuts the door behind him and I back away until I hit the kitchen counter gulping as I have no where else to go.
"Harry." I say but he shushes me, putting his finger against my lips. I raise my brows up at him and his breathing increases and its heavier.
"Let me stay the night?" He asks more than says and I don't know what to do but nod as I stare at his mouth. He grabs my waist and lifts me to the counter.
"You shouldn't be here." I breathe, shutting my eyes as I grin his hoodie.
"I want to kiss you." He breathes. "I want to kiss every single inch of your body."
"No." I open my eyes again. My heart is racing, ravishingly yearning for him but it isn't right. I push him back gently before I hop off of the counter and head towards the door again.
"Faye, I can't stop thinking." He stays in the kitchen. "It's strange to me, having a woman on my mind all day. I don't know what it is but it's irritating. I have to feed it."
I can't help but laugh. "You're not feeding anything. This is unprofessional, Harry. We're supposed to be-"
"Partners, yeah I know." He huffs. "I don't think I can deal with that and I don't think you can either."
I look to my feet, avoiding any eye contact.
"You should go, Harry." I speak quietly. I hear him take a deep breath before he walks towards me. Grabbing the door handle, he swings the door open and leaves. My heart is still pounding as i head back to my bedroom. Laying down, I can't help but feel regret for not kissing him. Even if it's wrong, there's this burning feeling I have that's telling me I should've. Maybe I should consider giving him up as a client but then again I've worked too hard for this, to be able to have my own client.
These feelings I have for him have to disappear or my job.
