Jailbird

~Part 2: Chapter 26~

Sienna

"Hello, Zedlin."

I remembered to speak clearly and calmly. Zedlin had a full twenty-four hours since telling me off about how careless I was with Mason.

"Hello, Sienna," his deep voice responded back just as calmly, much to my surprise.

It was sad to say, but I was nervous talking to him again. I didn't want to upset him and I didn't want him to make me feel more stupid than I already did on my own.

I decided to try talking about good things only.

"Um, so Nathan's really attached to David. It's such a beautiful relationship he and your dad has together. Sometimes when Nate's giving me a hard time at night, David will come and take him from me. They'll go downstairs and relax on the couch together. I'll send you some pictures," I said.

"Thanks. I'm glad to hear that my dad is taking care of you guys while I'm gone. Really gives me peace of mind," Zedlin said, sounding kind of bland.

I wondered if he even cared?

No, I knew he did. He was just still upset with me.

I let out a defeated sigh, "Zedlin, I apologized and it's still not enough for you. I don't want to argue anymore, but some of the things you said really hurt my feelings. I know you don't care—"

"I care about your feelings, Sienna. I just have a hard time showing it. You're complicated and I don't want you to drag my son into complicated situations. That's my biggest issue with you now," he said.

His words stung, but I actually thought about what those words meant before I reacted solely off of my emotions.

Complicated situations — I had definitely had my fair share of those, so he wasn't being dramatic at all and he was actually valid in his reasoning.

"I understand that and I'm going to continue forward by doing my best to grow out of that habit of mine. I'm sorry if you felt like I was putting our son into harms way. I would never do that intentionally, Zedlin."

"I know you wouldn't, but I want to be here so that I can be that voice of reason that you may need to avoid doing it by accident," Zedlin said in a calming manner.

I didn't see much of it, but I enjoyed calm Zedlin — hurtful Zedlin could kiss my asś.

I took in a deep breath through my nose and let it out through my mouth. Things were going to be okay as long as I tried to be better than the Sienna I was the previous day.

It was so hard to grow when taking steps backwards were necessary. Backwards was scary, because you could keep going in that direction if not careful.

I didn't want to continue to go backwards with Zedlin and I damn sure didn't want him to go backwards either.

How else would he be able to get free and live a life with us if he couldn't move forward? I had to encourage him and ensure him that I could do this.

He didn't have to worry about me messing it all up.

"I can do this, Zedlin. I'll need your help, but you can trust me to keep our son safe — I won't let you down."

"I know you won't, Sienna."

*

Zedlin

"What the hèll is that on his face? You let me fùcking down!" I exclaimed, glaring at Sienna through the screen of my brand new iPad.

Well, courtesy of this hèll hole I had been residing in for the past six months. I had finally got cleared for video chats.

Probably because they figured I wouldn't be getting out anytime soon.