The flame of desire (girlxgirl) ✔︎

The desire to not know➪𝟷𝟶

"You cut your hair?" Dylan was always quick to notice these things.

"Yeah, i never usually let my hair get past my shoulders. It was only a trim to be honest." I played with a piece of my hair.My caramel wavy locks are now up to my collar bones, they were at an awkward length before. Short hair frames my face and makes me look sexier.

"I like it." He smiled at me.

I know.

Dylan sat next to me on his couch, he placed his hand on mine and stared at me with loving eyes.

I love him, but I don't want him.

He leaned forward to kiss me, I close my eyes and kiss him passionately. Kissing feels nice but I've never kissed someone with a burning desire. Every day with Dylan reminds me that the spark I was once so invested in never even existed to begin with.

His lips are soft and tender. He knows how to to kiss, he's experienced. I've heard about all the girls at school who have had a chance to taste him, but he loves me and that feels good. He chose me. "I love you." He told me in between one of our kisses.

I know.

I never responded to his "I love yous" and he never asked me to. I'm glad.

I pull away from him, "How's school been." I ask, I don't really care.

"It's been okay,there's a new boy and he seems...Well  never mind, we have a game coming up this weekend ."

"Fun" I reply bluntly.

"What about you?" He asked, staring at me in such an endearing way that I found both sweet and repugnant .

"Meh, it's nothing special but hey, I'm going to start tutoring Roselina. I guess..."I stated, I didn't realise that a small smile traced my lips as soon as her name left my mouth until Dylan mentioned how jubilant I looked.

"You look excited. But..Who's Roselina?"

I look excited?

"That new girl in my form class."

"Ohhh! You mean Rose. Yeah she seems nice, you must be really fond of her huh?"

"Not really." I replied, agitated by that fatuous assumption. I don't like her. Not one bit.

"I want to kiss you." Dylan untimely changed the subject.

Yes, I know.

"You're so pretty..."

I know.

"And smart..."

I know.

"And now you're even generous. I'm glad to see how much you've changed, even if it's just for Rose."

My eyes widened, my stomach turned. Just for Rose? Roselina? No...

"I don't believe that you don't like her, you would hesitate to help even me." He laughed but for some reason he sounded kind of spiteful. "Iris, do you love me?" He abruptly and unexpectedly asked me the question that I had hoped to never hear.

My body stilled, my heart stopped, my train of thought collapsed. Why was he asking this... why now?

"Huh? Well...do you?" He gently continued to push the idea.

I don't know.

"Hm?" He really wasn't letting this go.

I don't know.

"I love you, but you already know that don't you?"

I know.

"So do you love me?" His voice grew slightly hostile.

I don't know.

"Do you love me, Iris?"

I don't.

"Of course I love you Dylan."