The Christmas Party

A Beautiful Sight, We're Happy Tonight

"Good morning," I said in a singsong voice when I opened the apartment door. Thea was in the kitchen cooking.

"Good morning," she said.

"I come bearing coffee."

Thea accepted the drink and took a sip. "That's strong."

"Yeah, it's Four-Shot-Friday."

"Excuse me?"

"I always get four shots on Friday, hence Four-Shot-Friday."

"Are you insane?"

"I don't know about you, but I'm beat on Fridays and I need the extra caffeine just to get me through the morning."

"I don't think you need anymore caffeine."

"I'm just going to wait for the text you send me today thanking me for the extra shots."

"You are definitely something else."

I did a mock bow and settled into the stool for the breakfast that I assumed would be served upon my arrival. I shoveled food into my mouth, unable to resist the delectable meals Thea cooked. "You're an amazing cook. Have I ever told you that?"

"Every time I cook," Thea laughed.

"Good, as long as you know. I think I'll just move in with you guys just so I can have your cooking every day."

"If I'm cooking all of the meals what are you going to do?"

"I'll clean, obviously. Take the trash out." I thought a moment. "And give you massages when you need them. I think that just about balances it out."

"Massages keep the house afloat?"

"Of course they do! Since you're the breadwinner and the cook you're bound to get tired, so I can give massages."

"I'm the breadwinner? Are you not going to work anymore?"

"Did I mention I'm going to be a stay-at-home wife? The massages are to kind of offset the fact that you and Luca will be supporting me. Well, let's be real here: Luca is a teacher, so you'll be supporting me."

"Is that so?" Thea laughed.

"Yes. I always pictured myself as a trophy wife."

"Who's trophy are you, exactly?"

"Yours, obviously. You've already showed me off to Mark. Twice. That makes me your trophy."

"You showed yourself off."

"Eh, same thing."

Thea stared at me for a moment then burst into laughter: a real and mirthful. I stood up so abruptly that my stool toppled over.

"Ladies and gentlemen!" I cried to the invisible crowd. "I, Louise Vaugh, on this day of December tenth, have made Theadora Isabelle Amato laugh out loud. Thank you, thank you." I did mock little bows all around.

"You're ridiculous," Thea gasped between laughter.

"I made you laugh—like actually laugh. This is cause for celebration!"

Thea shook her head, a huge smile plastered to her face. "I can't with you."

"Welcome to Four-Shot-Friday!"

Thea shook her head. "You're insane."

"So you've said." I winked. "As much as I'm enjoying our time together, I gotta get to work so Monica can harass me all day."

"She's still bothering you?" Thea asked.

"Yes! Everyday she asks me if I'm sure about my RSVP. I'm also pretty sure she's burned a hole in the photo of us I put on my desk. I swear, ever since I set out that picture she's gotten worse and she's always glaring at it when she passes by."

"Interesting," Thea said, her eyebrow curved. "Sounds like you need more pictures on your desk."

I shook my head and threw up my hands. "Hopefully she'll chill out after the party. But in the mean time, wish me luck!"

"Good luck."

"Oh, what time do you want your coffee tomorrow?"

"You're even getting me coffee on the weekends?"

"Of course I am."

Thea smiled. "Bring it to me whenever. I'll be awake."

I blew Thea a kiss. "Have a wonderful day at work, Thea Dearest."

"Bye, Louise."


I finished my coffee by eleven and I was wired; Four-Shot-Friday was the best thing I'd ever invented for myself. I moved through my emails and sent off a finished template to a client for approval. I was on top of the world. Better yet, Monica had yet to approach my desk, instead settling for glaring at me from across the room. I suppose after asking me every day this week if I was still coming to the Christmas party with my date she'd run out of ways to harass me.

Shortly after lunch a man with a huge bouquet of flowers walked into our office. All of our heads turned when he talked to the receptionist, who pointed at me. All eyes turned to me and I looked around confused.

"Louise Vaughn?"

"Yes?"

The delivery man handed me the bouquet. It was literally as big as my torso; I couldn't see over the top when he handed them to me.

"What the hell?" I muttered to myself.

"Who's it from?" Jim asked.

"I have no idea," I said, struggling to find the card in the huge bouquet. Jim plucked it from the center of the flowers and handed it to me. I put the massive bouquet down and read the card.

Louise,

Just returning the favor. I hope these flowers piss off Monica as much as your flowers pissed off Mark. Maybe she'll leave you alone. Or it will make it worse. Have a good day at work.

-Thea

"They're from my fri—girlfriend," I told Jim. We immediately looked over to Monica who was glaring daggers at the flowers as if willing them to wilt.

"Wow," Jim laughed. "That really pissed her off."

"I think that was the point," I said.

"Is your girlfriend jealous?"

"Of Monica?"

"Yeah."

I laughed. "No. Definitely not. I do think she wanted to mess with her though."

"That is pretty cool."

"Right? I think you'll like her. You're going to the party, right?"

"I am. You're actually going and not just saying you are to piss of Monica?"

"While I would love to do exactly that, I am going—and bringing my girlfriend."