ROSE' POV - All for you Lisa

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ROSE' POV (MOST OF THE SITUATIONS IN THIS CHAPTER ARE MADE UP)
"Hey Chae, do you still have my spare key to my apartment? Shit, I can't find it."

- Rosè is listening to the music-

"Rosieee? Stop the music, did you hear me?!"

Lisa pulls down the wire of my right earphone.
"Heyy, what are you doing!"
"Do you still have my spare key to my apartment? I'm sure I gave it to you when I had the Penshoppe interview."
"What? To me? No way."
"Didn't I ask you to feed the cats if I was late?"
"No Lisa."
"Damn, this brain, I can't remember anything."
"Maybe it was Jennie."
My fault. I couldn't contain my annoyed tone, but Lisa doesn't seem to have noticed.
She took her smartphone out of her pants pocket, and she's probably texting Jennie about the key issue. How can you not remember where you left your house keys? The one who loses things is me, I often lose my phone, but Lisa is not that distracted! Something is wrong with her, and I don't think it's only the rigid schedule. Anyway, I try to change the topic.
" Lisa, help me choose a puppy name. I can't decide."
"Mhh? what?"
Her eyes are still fixed on the screen, she only allows me to enjoy her perfect profile.
"The names I have chosen are Benny or... Benji.. I really like Benny, but also Nougat is nice.. or maybe something like... Hank?"
"Nice one, Rosie. I like this!"
"Hank? Yeah, it fits. He's so cute..."
A week ago, I adopted Mir. His name turns now into Hank with me, his new family.
We chose each other staring into our eyes, two soul mates in need of affection. He was at a temporary stay, weak, trembling, and looking for a lot of love. Excluding my fish Joo Huang, I haven't had a puppy since I became a trainee. Lisa pushed me to look for one, she always repeats her cats are extremely relaxing and healing. I wonder if she did it trying to ease my displeasure.
"Yeah, I think you will be a lovely mom."
"And you'll be the swag aunt!"
I turn on my smartphone on a Hank's photo.
"Look, Lisa, look how he was small and frightened!"

#hank #rosie #chaeyoung #rosè #blackpink #chaelisa

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#hank #rosie #chaeyoung #rosè #blackpink #chaelisa ... #allforyou?

"Ohh yes Chae, he is soooo cute, you already showed me."
Lisa is very distant these days. She answers bothered, full of inattention, her eyes glued to her smartphone.
"You didn't even look at the picture Lisa, you are only focused on your phone."
"So?"
This cocky attitude pisses me off. We grow up together, and every little change in one of us shines in the sunlight. It's impossible to hide.
A lot has changed between us in the last few years, especially for Lisa. She went through the hardest times. Maybe blinks have noticed something, they notice more than they should sometimes. But they have no idea what I, Jisoo, and Jennie have been through with Lisa. Do we want to talk about the SM mess? Or when she found out she was scammed by the manager during this spring? My mind can build a thousand plausible reasons to override what happened with Lisa, but more and more often I feel stifling by events.
Now I am playing a dangerous role, and I don't know how long I can last.

"You keep ignoring me when we're not in front of cameras."
There are times when I can handle it, and others, like now when I can't.
"Wait, what? I don't ignore you."
"Sure, you ignore me, look at you. You don't even watch me when I talk to you! Fuck Lisa. I was your... I feel left out."
Suddenly she raises her head and her deep eyes creep into mine.
"What are you talking about Rosie? I always mention you in interviews. I even told the story about the underwear you gave me."
"Because you're in the spotlight, Lisa! We know what means this attitude."
Every time Lisa stares at me, and not because someone is recording us, I feel weak. Why I can't keep eye contact with her,  even now?
"We are all very tired, you know. We have a lot of pressure on us, this year we had so many awesome results, but so many things didn't go."
"No Lisa, the truth is different and you know it. I am tied to the past, but it is not easy to accept this condition, especially for the things we have to act and pretend to cover other messes. The only good thing is that we no longer live in the dorm."
"Hey.."
She says, bringing her body close to mine.
"Chae, look at me."
I can't. I can't do it. My eyes are staring behind her shoulders.
"What were you listening to?"
She lifts the earphone wire that dangles in front of my chest and brings it closer to her ear.
It was playing UMI's song "Remember Me"

"Cuz I'm getting older
Know that I've changed
But I can't go back now
Nothing's the same
And I won't forget how
You called my name
When I was afraid
And now I'm afraid

So will you remember me
Will you remember the way that I was
Will you remember me
Will you remember the way that you felt when you're next to me."

What perfect timing.
"Wow. This rocks. Isn't this one of the songs in your Spotify playlist?"
"Did you listen to my playlist?" A small smile shows on my lips before I can hide it, even if I don't think it's clear who and what that playlist refers to.
I know she's looking at me but I couldn't hold her gaze right now. She tilts the head trying to catch my eyes, her right-hand lands on my wrist, then comes down to intertwine her fingers between mine.
"Move away from me, please."
For a split second my heart skipped a beat.
"Chae, I know how you feel. And I'm sorry for everything you have to go through because of me. But I'm always there for you, even with the cameras off. I know, I got you involved in a situation you didn't deserve, after me and Jennie.. you know.."
There is a force pressing down on me, my tongue feels dry while the music still goes with that resigned flow in the background.
"I have not forgotten what we have done together ... what we were ..."
Yeah, what we were. Now my world without you is colder, but I'm accustomed to it.
"I want to be strong, but I cannot be." I admit.

"Rosè look at me, please."
Lisa, you silly Thai monkey. You always get what you want from me. I lose contact with her fingers and her hands land on my back. Then she looks at me with those Bambi eye that can search so deeply into my soul. Despite the strain throughout my body, I can't help but let a tiny moan escape from my lips at the feel of her body pressed against mine.
"Lisa what are doing here..."
Her arms are always very protective when are wrapping around my slim body.
"Listen. You are the most important person in my life since we were trainees. You supported me; you have always been by my side with loyalty.  Hey! Even when unnie bullied this poor foreign who couldn't utter a word in Korean!"
"Bullied? They never bullied you, they joked, because you are playful, you know."
"Yeah, yeah I'm kidding." She says smiling.
The way her lips and cheeks lifted showing her big smile makes my cheeks burn as fire; damn I can't keep looking at you.
"We're the Maknae line Rosie! We are always together and always will be."
It is right, Lisa and I have most of the interactions in front of the cameras, hugs, cheeks kiss, hand in hand, body contact.
"Yeah. It's just because we are the younger, the sisters, but we both know we're covering something else!"

Just because we are the Chaelisa Maknae line, and we're playing the stupid roles.

"You were my first."

Shoot Lisa.
I didn't expect it. Her words make my heart beats pounding damn hard and fast inside my chest. I feel a shiver down to my spine, there was no need to remind me; I hastily turn my head far from her dark eyes, trying to fix my gaze on the mole on her neck.
"Ok Rosie, I know you're suffering from this whole thing, but more and more fans put eyes everywhere, also where they shouldn't, they exaggerate everything. I can't keep a hand behind my back that I'm touching someone. We need to handle the situation between all of us, also for you incoming solo."
"Sometimes I would rather they stop making me act this way with you! I saw Jennie Unnie doesn't mind about her self-control! So, what is it for?! What the hell is my purpose?"
My own words bring me a lump to my throat. I stop, trying to hold back the grief rumbling inside me, but I can't, I fear that soon wet hot tears will fill up my eyes.
"So, what should I do? You know how is Jennie."
I know it's not up to Jennie, nor you. I see you, Lisa. I see the pain in those eyes when you can't be yourself and do what you want.
"You don't have to do anything Lisa, not even Unnie. Things can go on like this, I do it all for you."
My eyes begin to glimmer with tears, a warm drop falls on my cheek.
"Come on Rosie.."
Her hand is lovingly rubbing my shoulder, I would just like to disappear into her embrace forgetting about the world around me.
"You'll ruin your makeup if you do this, please not now."
"It's not my fault Lisa."

"I can't find Rosé, Jisoo do you know where ..."
Manager unnie's voice makes me jump. Shit. Lisa breaks the embrace and immediately pulls back; I try to cover my face crossed by tears.
"Oh, you're here! Ehyyyy girls..are you all right?"

While my index finger passes under my lower eyelid, I hear Jisoo's voice, I recognize her nervous tone.

"Lisa, aren't you late?"

"Yes, I am. I have to run to rehearsals, sorry guys!"
I catch Lisa's furtive gaze, her annoyance is palpable but with a slight head nod, I reassure her: I already know what to invent.

HAUNT YOU [JENLISA - CHAELISA - BLACKPINK] Truth Revealed - Yari ParkWhere stories live. Discover now