Till The End

Fourteen

"I can't believe you guys are actually going on a second date." Heidi smiles as I take a seat next to her in the break room.

I look over at her. "I know." I laugh, nodding.

"So what are you wearing?" she asks excitedly a few moments later.

"Something casual. It's early dinner."  I shrug. "Like five pm. It's causal. I'll be back home before the sun even goes down."

She sighs. "Boring."

"Shut up." I laugh, shoving her playfully. "He was being considerate of my needs when we set the date up."

"And your needs are?"

I narrow my eyes at her. "To be a good mother. I don't want me beginning to date to get in the way of my relationship with Bella. She's still my main priority. I'm never losing sight of that." I shake my head. "I don't like it when she spends too much time at my moms. Especially when I'm not working and can be at home with her." I sigh. "After the date I'll pick her up and we'll go home and watch movies until she falls asleep and maybe I'll let her have a few snacks to make up for it."

"You're such a good mom." she smiles. "I don't think too many mothers would choose their kids over a hot guy."

I laugh, shaking my head. "Yeah, well they're idiots. I'm never choosing a guy over my girl."

We talk for a little while longer until it's time for us to get back to work. "Okay, well have fun on your date tomorrow and call me as soon as you get home. I'll come over so you can tell me all the details."

"Yeah, okay." I laugh, rolling my eyes. "Talk to you later."

- - - -

"I'm glad we both picked up on the more casual vibe for tonight." I laugh, as I take my seat across from Juan. It's now five pm and after a long day with Bella, I had no energy left to dress any better then I am right now. She woke me up far too early for my liking on a day off, and she insisted we played with her dolls almost all day. I love her to death, but an hour or two to myself were much needed. I had driven over to my moms house and dropped Bella off, and Juan offered to pick me up there as well so we would just arrive together.

He chuckles, nodding. "Yeah. You still look great though." he smiles.

I smile. "Thanks. You do too." I nod. He really does. I swear, he gets more and more attractive every time I see him, it's insane.

"What did you do all day?" he asks, taking a sip of his drink.

I smile, shaking my head. "Nothing you'd be interested in hearing, believe me."

"Try me." he smiles, putting his glass down and giving me all his attention.

I nod. "I played with dolls all day." I laugh a little at how silly is sounds. "It could be hours and hours of playing dolls, and Bella would never get tired of it. She loves it when I play with her. So I do." I shrug.

"You're an amazing mother, Ximena." he smiles, nodding.

I inhale sharply, nodding. "I have to be."

"Can I ask you something?" he asks, eyebrows furrowed.

"Sure."

He clears his throat. "Do you ever wish things were different? With your ex." he clarifies. "Do you wish things had worked out between the two of you?"

"For Bella's sake..." I nod slowly. "Sometimes. Yeah, sometimes I do. But I don't get too hung up on the thought of it. He's not here and I swore to myself I wouldn't spend the rest of my life wishing he were. We're doing just fine without him."

He smiles sadly, nodding. "Yeah."

"Okay, we've picked apart every part of my life. You know all about my daughter and her idiot of a father." I clear my throat, smiling. "Your turn."

He chuckles. "What do you mean?"

"Any exes? Ever been in love? Any child out there that I don't know about?"

He laughs loudly now, shaking his head. "I don't have any kids. At least none that I know about." he teases, causing me to roll my eyes. "I've dated here and there.." he nods. "Nothing serious ever. So, no, I've never been in love."

"Ever?" I ask, kind of in shock at his answer.

He shakes his head. "Nope. Never. Why? Does that surprise you?" he asks.

"Kind of." I nod slowly.  "You just...I don't know." I let out a small laugh, shaking my head. "You're such a flirt, you strike me as an extremely passionate and romantic man, I guess I'm just shocked that you've never fallen in love with someone." I shrug.

He grins. "Passionate and romantic?"

"You know what I mean." I smile, rolling my eyes. "You're really passionate about your job, you love it a lot, you're just...a passionate person." I shrug, laughing, and not knowing another way to explain it. "I just assumed you've been in love before."

He shakes his head. "I haven't been, but I've been wanting to change that for a while now." he smiles a little. "I used to think I didn't have the time for a serious relationship, that the only things meant for me were flings, that I should never let myself grow real feelings for a woman, that I should only have flings here and there."

"Why?" I ask, furrowing my eyebrows in confusion.

He sighs. "I started my career when I was a teenager. Like sixteen." my eyes widen. "I was always told by the people around me how much focus and discipline I had to have if I wanted to be successful. I guess I just translated that into potential relationships too. So I just didn't have any. I thought girlfriends would just distract me. I wanted to be successful so badly, that I didn't give myself time to focus on my love life. I've just stuck to casual sex since I was a teenager. Maybe a date or two with the girls I hook up with, and then I'm onto the next." he shrugs. "I swear, it keeps me up at night just thinking about all the amazing women I could've been missing out on cause all I ever used them for was sex." he sighs, shaking his head.

"What..." I start slowly, extremely interested in everything he's telling me. "what made you want a serious relationship then?"

"Look at me." he says, gesturing at himself. "I'm the most successful I've ever been right now." I nod, agreeing with him. "But I'm not happy. Not as happy as I could be with someone by my side to enjoy it with me, anyway. And I look around at all of the artists and celebrities that I know who are way bigger than me, and some of them are in serious relationships—married even!" he exclaims. "And their significant others haven't gotten in the way of their success, in my opinion they might have even helped. They're there for the hard times, when things aren't as glamorous they may seem to be, and they're there for the moments that are. They stick with them through it all. I want that." he shrugs.

I nod, my throat dry. I'm speechless. He's everything I could've ever wanted in a man. He wants something serious. He's searching for it. I feel my heart beginning to race a million miles a minute as I come to the realization of just how easily I could fall for him.