TEMPORARY ; SAKUSA

²³ BECAUSE OF SAKUSA KIYOOMI

⚠️ brief mention of suicidal
thoughts (not sakusa or y/n)

STARTING YOUR DAY WITH KIYOOMI WAS your shot of espresso in your morning coffee—your daily dose of energy all bundled up in your favorite person. What better way to begin your day if it weren't for the extra five minutes of spooning after your alarm goes off? If it weren't for the celestial sight of him in a black apron making breakfast? Or if it weren't for the intimate morning showers you share together if time permits? Honestly, you could go on and on, writing a whole novel filled with every single detail about your early mornings spent with Kiyoomi.

Most often whilst you're getting ready for work, Kiyoomi would normally barge into your room to watch you do your daily hair and make-up routine. He'd lay against the headboard, sneaking candid pictures of you fixing your hair or applying lip balm to your lips. And you could vaguely recall the one day you asked him why he likes watching you get ready, to which he replied, "Because watching my pretty girl get ready starts my day." Although he claims he dislikes cheesy remarks, you found it quite humorous whenever he doesn't realize he's doing it to you—regardless, it still gives you butterflies every single time.

Unfortunately, today doesn't seem to be the case because he didn't show up. God, you felt so pathetic for hoping he'd come into your room to watch you again. Once you were finished, you grabbed your things before heading out only to spot him sitting comfortably in the living room whilst his eyes were glued to his phone. Now, you weren't too sure if his sour mood persisted, though you were certain from him not coming to your room earlier that he still is.

"Ready?" you stood before him, trying to search for clues in those never-ending black holes that were his eyes. And yet, those eyes that you've lost yourself in countless of times—the ones that kept you afloat in the vast ocean whilst you basked in the warmth of the sun didn't have that distinct glow it always had. Because now, you were sinking in the seemingly bottomless chasm where the deep sea creatures pulled you further and further below until you could no longer see the beautiful, bright rays of light that is Sakusa Kiyoomi.

If you were given a chance to get run over at this very second, you'd take it in a heartbeat because you'd rather suffer the severe injuries it would cause than endure this torturous car ride. Honestly speaking, you could vouch that this is way worse than when you were both in that awkward stage of when you first met—you swore you've been in this car for a whole hour, but in reality, it's only been seven minutes.

On a normal day, Kiyoomi would typically converse with you about your job to allow you to release your stress load of a mere intern, or suggest doing something later together to take your mind off of your hectic duties—but nothing. Nothing but the other vehicles passing by and his faint breathing were heard—not even the radio could release the unbearable tension just searching every nook and cranny for a way out of his Audi. And so, your only option was to stare at the tall buildings and pedestrians, and pray to God that the clock ticked faster.

"Have a good practice," you forced a half-smile, leaning in to kiss his cheek. But at the last second, he turned the other way, purposely avoiding it. "See you later?"

He only gave a short nod without meeting your eyes, not once breaking his gaze from his white knuckles that gripped the steering wheel too roughly. As you stepped inside Tokyo Law Enterprise, you could feel the weight of your chest get heavier and heavier, but really, what could you do about it? All you can do is wait and stay hopeful because you wanted to respect his boundaries by not forcing him to tell you. Trying to think nothing of it, you pushed it aside knowing how your emotions affect your work ethic. Maybe he'll be in a better mood when he gets off from practice. It's still morning, but you felt as if you were suffering through every known symptom of caffeine withdrawals—the throbbing pain in your head, your muscles experiencing fatigue, and the nauseating feeling bubbling up within your chest.