Lost Memories // Drarry

Chapter 35: Playing with Fire

"I'm going to destroy you." Harry hadn't even realized that the words dripped out of his mouth like poison until he sees Draco shudder. Harry starts to notice the pounding in his skull as it thumps in his ears. He chooses to ignore it for now. 

Harry's hand moves from its grip on Draco's chin down to his throat. He wraps his fingers around it and watches as Draco's eyes roll back. Their lips are but a breath apart. Harry watches as Malfoy closes the gap just a bit more. He isn't even sure if Malfoy is aware of what he is doing. 

A sharp pain spikes in his head, and Harry gasps. He sways and suddenly feels ill. He feels sick with himself. What the fuck is he doing? This isn't like him at all.

His eyes catch a glint of light, and he searches for the source. A reflection of them against glass stands out like a ghost haunting him. He doesn't recognize himself. His reflection looks like an entirely different version of himself, and suddenly he feels revolted. His cruel, twisted smile turns his stomach as it drops to a frown. 

He looks crazed, like the need for power dominates him. He looks like the villain as he crushes a wilted flower in his cold hands. Harry suddenly feels like vomiting as his headache increases tenfold. 

He isn't even sure who he is anymore. His grip slackens and falls, and he suddenly feels enormous guilt. He feels so confused as his eyes blur and his breathing increases. He is going insane. 

He needs to leave. He needs to get out of here. This is too much. Why did he get himself into this situation? He feels like his head is going to split open any second. Why couldn't he have minded his business? He should have just aimed for a quiet year with no drama after everything he has been through. Malfoy was leaving him alone! He wasn't even bothering Harry, and Harry had to muck it all up. 

He doesn't even know why he did any of that just now. What was he hoping to accomplish? Harry must be out of his mind. He hasn't been sleeping, but that still isn't an excuse. It's like ever since he saw Malfoy, he has been expecting a confrontation, and since it never came, he had to cause problems. Why can't he just move on?

It's like no matter how much he tries to distance himself from Malfoy and from the memories, he always gets pulled back. He is addicted to his addiction. He couldn't function without instability. He had to cause problems so that he could fix them. 

Harry is about to pull away when suddenly Malfoy presses his lips against Harry's. Harry's eyes go wide as he realizes what is happening. Suddenly, his head feels like it is being cracked open. As soon as their lips met, sparks lit a fire underneath him and not in a good way. He shoves Malfoy away violently, and Malfoy's body makes an awful noise as it smacks a table behind him.

Harry's chest heaves as he struggles to breathe. His blood rushes in his ears as he chokes on air. A spike of pain hits his chest, and he can't breathe. He gasps and attempts to drag in a lungful of air as he bends over, hands on his knees.

That was not how that was supposed to go. Malfoy wasn't supposed to actually kiss him! Harry felt revolted as he collapses onto his knees. So many confusing thoughts and rampaging emotions run through his head as his vision blurs.

Harry makes an odd, strangled noise as he searches for air. He clutches his head as he feels memories pounding against their binds. He feels like vomiting as he tries to keep them at bay. 

His hands fall to the floor as he loses his control. He can't keep them at bay any longer as he starts spasming violently.

***

Draco groans as he peels himself off of the cold floor.

His head pounds, and he moves lightly to assess for any injuries. He doesn't sense anything broken, but he probably has a concussion and heavy bruising.