Soulmates

6

I sat in the parking lot for a long time, watching the sun rise. I had finally stopped crying, but that glue that was keeping my heart together was now gone and I was broken again.

I saw this coming, so I shouldn't have been this upset. I shouldn't have been upset because now she was finally reunited with my mom. She was finally with her husband. I couldn't keep her here just for me, I had to just let her go.

Once I was calmed down for a while I drove home, feeling the exhaustion hit. Luckily I didn't live too far from the hospital because I was afraid I was going to crash my car from being so tired.

When I got home Beatrice was getting ready to leave for work. "Violet?" She asked as I walked into the house. "She's gone." I whispered as she gasped slightly.

"Oh, sweetie. I'm so sorry." She said and pulled me into her arms. I thought I was out of tears by now but my body thought otherwise as I sobbed into her shirt. "Shhh, you're okay..it's okay." She cooed and combed her fingers through my hair.

"Do you want me to stay home from work to be with you?" She asked as I pulled away. "No, it's okay. My friend is flying in." I explained and wiped my eyes. "Do you want me to wait until they get here? I don't want you to have to be alone." She said as I nodded.

"I just want to sleep...it's been a long night." I said as she guided me towards my bedroom. "You go sleep, I'll call into work and tell them I'll be a little late. I'll let your friend in, don't worry." She said as I trudged towards my bedroom.

"Thanks, Beatrice. I really appreciate it." I said quietly as she hugged me one more time. "It's not a problem." She said then led me to the bed.

I climbed in and pulled the covers up to my shoulder, then hugged the pillow in front of me. I heard Beatrice leave the room then close the door.

It didn't take long for me to sleep but it wasn't peaceful at all. I had nightmare after nightmare after nightmare. They ranged from my parents accident, to me leaving Colby, to my grams death.

I was half asleep when I felt someone slip into the bed, hugging me. "Hmm?" I wimpered as they hugged me tighter. "It's just me." Ki said as I turned in her arms to hug her. I started crying again as she combed her fingers through my hair. "Shhhhh, it's okay." She whispered and just let me cry.

I ended up falling asleep again, having the same string of nightmares. When I woke up I felt unrested, but I needed to get up.

"Good morning sunshine. How are you feeling?" Ki asked as I sat up and rubbed my eyes. "Like shit. Thanks for being here though." I said with a sigh as she smiled softly at me. "It's what best friends do." She said then stood up.

"I ordered you some breakfast which will be here in a couple minutes. Your phone was ringing so I answered it. The nursing home your grandma lived in wants you to come in. They're sorry for your loss." She said as I got out of bed and stretched.

"I can't believe she's gone." I said with a sigh. "I know, I'm so sorry, V. I wish you could catch a break." She said as I walked to the bathroom so I could get cleaned up.

I looked like I hadn't slept in weeks but it didn't matter. I was allowed to look like shit.

I got in the shower and cleaned up, then brushed my teeth and washed my face. I was feeling a little bit better as I walked back into my bedroom.

Ki had set up the food she ordered on the bed. "I hope you're hungry...I ordered a lot." She said then scratched her head. "Thank you, Ki...for everything." I said then sat down on the bed next to her.

"You're welcome, V. I hope you know I'm always here for you." She said as I nodded. "I know." I said then started eating.

It was weird that I was sitting in my ex best friends house, with my real best friend. My friendship with Ki showed me how horrible my friendship with Daisy was.

I couldn't imagine life without her at this point.

We ate breakfast then went to the nursing home. I felt the pain in my chest as we pulled into the parking lot. I had been here hundreds of times by now, but this was the first time I wasn't here to see grams.

Ki took my hand and squeezed it gently as we walked inside. "Oh Violet.." Josie said as she came from behind the desk to hug me. "I'm so sorry for your loss." She said as I hugged her. "Thank you." I said then pulled away.

When we got to grams old room I felt my heart break once again. There were fresh flowers on the table from the nurses that had a little card for me. I frowned then turned to Josie.

"We thought Genevieve would have wanted you to have some flowers. She loved getting them so much." She said as I nodded. "She did, thank you." I said then sniffed the flowers.

We spent the next couple hours going through her belongings. When we found the photo album I made her I looked through it, showing Ki the pictures.

"Holy shit, V. You look just like your mom." She said and pointed to the picture I put of my parents on their wedding day. "Yeah, we have the same eyes." I remarked as I traced my finger over the picture. When I flipped the page I was met by the picture Colby and I took at the Hollywood sign.

It was my favorite picture of us, since we looked so happy. I kept it in the album because grams always commented about how much it reminded her of papa. She would always get a little emotional on this page, telling me that if I ever found a love like theirs to never let it go.

I felt stupid because I did let it go, but I had my reasons for it.

I didn't regret leaving Colby anymore, since I got to spend the last nine months of my grandma's life with her. I wouldn't have been able to live with myself knowing that I wasn't here for her.

"You still love him, don't you?" Ki asked quietly as I absentmindedly found myself tracing Colby's face in the picture with my finger. "I'm not sure. I loved the him I knew in these pictures. That I do know." I said then closed the book.

"Come on, we have to finish up so we can go to the funeral home." I said then stood up and put the photo album in the box.

It only took a little while longer for us to pack up her stuff since she didn't have much. Ki and I just kept getting distracted, gushing over things that she had. There was a book she had that had a love letter from my papa in it.

It was truly the sweetest thing.

"Alright, well thank you for everything." I said and gave each of the nurses a hug. "Let us know if you need anything. Also let us know about the funeral, we want to come." Josie said as I nodded. "Will do." I said then turned to Ki. "Ready?" I asked as she nodded. "Yep, let's go." She said then linked her arm through mine.

When we got to the funeral home I looked at Ki. "You don't have to do this with me if you don't want to." I said as she shook her head. "You gotta stop doing that. I'm here for you no matter what." She said then got out of the car.

When we got inside I walked to the front desk area. "Hi, how can I help you?" The man behind the desk asked. "Um...I've never really done this before. I just..I have to plan a funeral." I said as Ki took my hand and squeezed it.

"Well you've come to the right place. I'm so sorry for your loss." He said as I nodded. "Thank you." I said as he pulled out some papers. "The hospital should have given you some paperwork, do you have that?" He asked as I nodded and pulled it out of my bag.

He started writing stuff down as I looked around the room. I felt like I was going to throw up from the stress and sadness, but I kept it together as best as I could.

We spent the next couple hours planning the funeral. We decided it was going to be on Saturday, so it would give me some time to mourn without people around.

It was going to be a small service since we really didn't know that many people and the rest of my family had passed away. I ended up having to use some of the emergency money I had from my parents to pay for the funeral, but it was worth it.

Grams only deserved the best.