Broken Like Me (USWNT Fanfic)

Helpful Squirrel?

I hope you enjoy this chapter and thank you for all the support!

Warnings: Dark thoughts, mentions of a suicide attempt, therapy 

Kelley's POV:

Me, Mal and Caitlin hang out for a bit more and I start to see the slightly more vulnerable side of the newbie. "Kelley catch me!" Mal says launching herself on me. I catch her and see Caitlin laugh and check her phone. I see her frown and take a deep breath. "You okay Cait?" I ask her and she smiles. "Yeah of course, I'm just going to head outside for a bit." I shake my head. "Nope I'll come with you kiddo. No offence but I don't want you running away again." She nods and I place Mal down. "Mal do you mind if it's just me and Kelley?" Mal runs over to Cait and hugs her. "That's fine, have fun." We head out and I see Caitlin fiddling with her hands. "What's got you so on edge?" "Oh it's nothing don't worry about it!" She says smiling. "Kid I'm here to help, I want to help. Now what has gotten you so riled up?" "I'm not good enough to be here." I look at her and laugh. "Wow thanks Kelley that really helped." She jokes. "It's not that kid. You don't think your good enough to be here, that's the anxiety and doubt talking. Tell it to fuck off okay. Don't listen to it." She frowns. "It's hard..." I let her continue knowing that she's not used to people listening to her. "It's like I feel like I'm worthless, like I'm never going to get anywhere. My only point in life is to help and protect Nix. It's like I just ugh I don't see the point in living." "Woah woah." I engulf her into a hug and feel her shaking. "Cait that's a really intense thing to say." I tell her. "Kelley." I look at her and she pulls out a flask. "I can't stop, I need it. That's the only reason I'm still going." I cry a bit and take the flask. "Kelley please I need it." I shake my head. "No Caitlin you are more than this, you are so much more than this. Let me help you." "I don't want to get hurt again." I sigh. "I won't hurt you I promise, I just... Cait I want to know what's going on with you."

Caitlin's POV:

"You wanna know what's going on with me." I start to get angry a thing I do to try and make myself look more in control when I'm actually crumbling. "I'm losing myself! I tried to commit last year and it didn't fucking work! I can't even do that right. My parents didn't want me cause I'm such a disappointment! I just I don't know what to do anymore Kells." I hold back tears as I scream at the veteran. She looks at me and I could tell she felt bad. "No don't make that face. Don't feel bad I'm sorry for snapping I didn't mean to-" She hugs me again and I relax. "Now then, I think you need to get some help. I can come with you and help." I shake my head and panic. "No Kells I can't have someone else get involved." She sighs. "You need to talk to someone about it. Did you tell anyone about the attempt?"
Flashback:
"Nix where are you going?" I ask and she looks at me. I'm going to go out for a bit." "Matron will kill you though." She sighs. "I know but I can't miss this school thing, I can finally play my music!" She says excited and I smile. "You wanna come?" I look at her and she nods slightly. "Its cool another day yeah?" I smile and she walks off. "See ya in a bit Cait." "Have fun Nixy!" She walks out and I lay down on the floor. I break down as I feel pain wash through me from the beating last night. I might as well just end it. I pick up my bottle of Jack Daniels and grab the pills from the bathroom. I put the pills in my mouth and down the alcohol. I laugh knowing I made a mistake. To late now I guess. After a while I hear the door open and someone shout. I remember passing out and waking up in the hospital. 

I was on a suicide watch for 2 weeks after that. "Kells I just want to feel love you know. I'm lost. I don't know what I'm doing." She nods and pulls out her phone. "I'm going to book an appointment, I will be with you the whole time and if you don't like it we can stop okay." I nod my head and she smiles. "And kiddo." "Yeah." "I love you." I laugh and she giggles. "Now let's head back." 

Nix's POV:
Me and Tierna head back to the room and cuddle for a bit. "I'm proud of you Felix, you really let people in today." I nod my head. I still haven't eaten yet but I don't want Tierna to be mad. "What are you thinking about?" She asks and I smile. "Nothing babe." "Nix tell me." I sigh. "I haven't eaten today." She looks at me. "Well tea is in a bit we can eat then yeah." I nod. "Until then can I have a kiss?" I laugh and climb on top of Tierna and kiss her. She flips us over and I giggle. "God your perfect." I feel myself blush as she kisses my neck. "Do you want to be my girlfriend?" I hear her ask and I smile. "Of course!" She hugs me and I close my eyes. It really does get better. 

Mal's POV:
Caitlin and Kelley come back and I could tell that Kelley talked to Cait and calmed her down. "Right imma hang out with Alex until tea so have fun you two." Kelley walks out and I look at Cait. "Well then hello gorgeous." She blushes as I giggle. "Hello beautiful." I tackle her into the bed and kiss her neck. "Mal." She breathes out. "Yeah." "Can you do me a favour?" She asks and I look at her. "Of course what is it?" "Become my girlfriend." I laugh and she pouts. "Not the reaction I wanted if I'm honest." I kiss her and feel her smile. "Of course baby." I say and she gives me a thumbs up. "You are adorable." "Only for you sexy." She says winking. I laugh. "Um on a serious note though." I look at her knowing she is only serious when she needs to be. "Kelley has um booked me a therapy appointment. I snapped at her when we went on a walk and told her some things and so she wants me to get help. She will come with me and I'll try it. If I don't mind it I might keep going. I'm sorry." "Why are you saying sorry?" She sighs. "Cause it's weak, I need to be strong for you. Especially now your my girlfriend." I look at her. "Caitlin, you are so strong. You have been through stuff that I can't imagine. Getting help doesn't make you weak. In my eyes it makes you stronger because you admit that you need help which is very hard to do. I care about you so much and I know that this is better for you so I want you to try it and be honest okay." She cries a little and I comfort her. "Thank you." I smile. "It's the least I could do for my amazing girlfriend." "That sounds good." She chuckles and I smile. I'm really falling for this girl.  

1288 Words. 28th of January 2021. I hope you enjoyed this chapter and have an amazing day/night.