Beautiful Joy

13

Like Kent had said, David came home early Sunday morning. He had came to my room to apologize for taking my phone and raising his voice. He explained that he let his fear for not being able to find me turn to anger. I don't know David well yet but he seemed sincere with his apology.

"I spoke with Jacob and we agreed to limit calls to every other day". I was about to abject but he held his hand up and continued "You can talk to Jacob, it was his suggestion. With school starting he doesn't want you to be too tired. In exchange for limiting the calls, we agreed to him and the girls visiting monthly."

David went on to apologized for being gone so much, explaining they had a important project to finish at work. He had to go back to the city for a few more days, but he asked if he could take me out, just the two of us when he gets back. I accepted and was actually looking forward.

So thankful to have my phone back I spent the rest of the day FaceTiming and texting Kate and Max. I did my best to avoid my brothers, worried they felt the same way Kent did, and was just tolerating me.

Sean noticed the change, "Joy everything ok, I haven't seen you much". I nodded "Ok well if you need anything ask ok." Sean seemed like a decent guy and genuinely seemed to care, but the words Kent said that night were on repeat in my head. I had really started to care for Sean and Paul and needed to put a little distance between us. My chest hurt with the thought they could feel the same as Kent.

The week passed slowly, as I isolated myself to my room. On the mornings I called my dad I would, bring my coffee up to my room to avoid any unwanted run-ins.

My calls to dad might be limited but they didn't limit me from talking to Max and Kate. I spent a lot of time texting and FaceTiming them throughout the week.

During a FaceTime with Max, he finally asked what was up. I guess I wasn't doing as well as I thought with hiding my emotions. "Joy, what's wrong? You've been off all week. Did something happen?"

I shrugged my shoulders but didn't say anything. I could already feel the lump in my throat.

"Please tell me, or I might have to drive down there. I can't stand seeing you so upset, you've been off all week".

The concern in his voice and the look on his face made me smile, but a tear slipped out. I quickly wiped it away. "I miss everything, I miss home. I don't belong here, I think they hate me."

I moved the phone away from my face, I didn't want him to see more tears fall. "Joy...joy please."
I could hear his soft kind voice through the phone. "Please pick up the phone, it's killing me not being able to hold you, at least let me see you."

Taking a deep breath and wiping about the tears again I picked up the phone. "No one could hate you, tell me why you think that."

I explained that night and how I've kinda been hiding out in my room since. I could tell Max was upset, he wanted to tell dad what had happened. I begged him not to, there was nothing dad could do and I didn't want him to feel bad. Max reluctantly agreed and stayed on the phone with me for hours, making me laugh and telling me stories.

Throughout the week Sean or Paul would ask if I wanted to hang but I would decline, saying I wasn't feeling well or was too tired. It wasn't the real reason but it wasn't a lie either. With all the changes and the anticipation of school my nerves had me feeling sick often.

I woke early Saturday morning, dreams of home haunting my sleep. I missed my mom, my family and my friends. Laying in bed thinking of home, it struck me that I never opened the gift my dad had gave me before I left. 

Getting up I went to my closet, pulling it off the top shelf. Sitting down on the carpeted closet floor, I removed the ribbon and opened the box. It looked like a photo album, opening the cover I saw the first picture was of mom and me. Mom was so young and I couldn't of been more than a few days old. Mom was so beautiful and aged well, the only signs that the picture was 15 years ago was the absence of her laughter wrinkles around her eyes.