imprisonment

Chapter 40; D

Draco was supposed to train. He sat staring at the ceiling wish he never had to get up. The duvet laid over him, keeping him warm from the coldness the manor gave off. He could see the sun shining in through the windows and he turned over trying to ignore the light. He wanted to stay in bed forever and pretend everything wasn't happening.

He wanted to be a child again, wrapped in the green covers hiding from imaginary monsters instead of the real ones. Instead, he was forced to train for a battle he wanted no part in, on a side that wanted Hermione dead.

He fucking missed her. He missed her so much it ached through his whole body. Everything reminded him of her. At moments it felt like their time together was a dream-like it never happened. He would find himself reaching his arm out to grab her while he was sleeping, just to realize that she wasn't there.

It was pathetic and so fucking difficult to put on a mask every time he left the safety of his room. He had to pretend to be someone he wasn't. He had to put on a show, pretending to fight the resistance. He had to pretend that he didn't want to kill everyone who wanted her dead. He's never cast the killing curse, but if he heard her name leave someone's mouth again he would.

His thoughts were interrupted by the popping sound of a house elf. He groaned turning over in his bed desperate for more time to sleep. He didn't feel like putting on the facade just yet.

"Sir, it is time for your training master says," the elf told him. He was sure it was his father sending the elf. As much as he hated his father for forcing him into it, it would come in handy later.

"Fuck," he groaned, pulling the covers to the side and getting up. He stretched his arms out and went to his wardrobe, pulling out a shirt to wear. He put it on, along with some other clothes before leaving his room. He was in casual clothes, not in the mood to dress nicely.

He walked through the long corridor before making his way down the stairs. His hand slid along the railing as he walked down the steps. He occluded as he went, making himself the Death Eater he was supposed to be.

When he was in the parlor, he was shocked, seeing Blaise and Pansy in front of him. They caught him off guard, making it hard to keep his walls up. A smile crept on his face, he hasn't seen them since the battle of Hogwarts and missed them more than he had realized.

"Long time no see," Blaise said pulling him in for a side hug and patting him on the back. He looked just like he had always done, making it hard for Draco to imagine him killing anyone. He wondered if Blaise had taken the mark or not but decided not to ask.

"Looking a little rough around the edges," Pansy laughed, ruffling his hair before pulling him in for a hug. She smelt of expensive perfume like she always did and her long hair was now cut short.

"Azkaban will do that to ya," Draco smirked trying to make light of the situation. Blaise and Pansy both awkwardly laughed and he began to get uncomfortable, putting his hand on the back of his neck.

"Your mom told me to give this to you," Blaise said handing him a wand and diffusing the tension. He twirled it in his hand, feeling it acclimate to him. It was different than his wand, but it would have to do. He was just grateful to have one.

"I guess let's practice then. I'm ready to beat some arse," Draco said thumbing the wand in his hand. He wondered if Hermione had a wand to protect herself with. He immediately filled with concern for her and his mind started to race. He took a deep breath and reigned in his thoughts, reminding himself that he shouldn't be thinking about her when he's not alone.

"Don't speak too soon," Pansy said interrupting his train of thought. Draco led the way out of the parlor and outside into the gardens.

The September wind blew against his cheeks, reminding him it would be winter soon. He tried to take a deep breath and ignore all the weight on his shoulders to protect Hermione while also making sure Voldemort trusted him. All he could think of was the last time he was there.