Don't say that you love me

part 35

(Ryder pov)

My eyes scanned the packed room as Niall placed his hand on my lower back. There were so many people dancing and talking in this small club.

Niall lowered his lips to my ear, "Let's go get a drink and meet up with the boys." He told me. I look up at him and nodded as we began to push through the crowd.

"Watch it." A blonde girl snapped as we walked by. Niall continued forward without paying any attention to the girl.

I don't know why but i was extremely nervous to see Harry. I mean, the last time i had seen him he was fast asleep on my couch.

"Niall, Ryder!" A familiar voice called to us from the bar. I peaked over to see Louis and Eleanor standing there. 

They motioned us forward as we walked over to them. Eleanor was wearing a blue dress with her hair pinned back in a clip.

"I love your dress Eleanor." I said with a grin as her eyes lit up. She cupped the bottom of her dress in both hands as she looked down.

"Thank you! It's new i thought it was adorable!" She squeeled with a grin as she turned to look back up at me.

"Where's Zayn, Liam, and Harry?" Niall asked Louis. My heart skipped a beat at the mention of Harry's name. Eleanor and Louis both peaked towards me as my cheeks began to redden.

"Zayn went to get Perrie, Liam and Danielle are dancing, and Harry.." Louis began as he looked up at me again. "Harry isn't here yet."

The tension between us three was unbearable. I already knew that they had known about Harry and I, but i had no idea what Harry had said recently to Louis.

"He's always late to these things except it used to be because of that girl he was dating." Niall told them as my breath caught in my throat. I felt Louis and Eleanor's eyes on me again as i looked down at the floor. I remember specific times when Harry had needed to leave to go to events such as this one.

"Well let's get a drink!" I shouted over the music as i stepped closer to the bar. I rested my hands on it as i looked over at the bartender.

"4 shots, and keep them coming please." I said with a smile. I was going to need a ton of shots to get through tonight.

"I'm here." A familiar husky voice says from in back of me to his friends. I didn't need to turn to know it was Harry.

"About time! We thought you were going to completely miss the whole party!" Niall says with a grin as i turn to look at them. Harry's eyes were glued to me.

"I wouldn't dare. Hey, Ryder can i talk to you for a minute?" Harry says as Niall turns to look at me. My eyes grew wide as I stared back at him.

"Can it wait? We are at a party." I said with a small grin as the bartender returned with our drinks. I picked up a shot and gulped it down.

"No, its about Nialler's birthday! I want to get your input." Harry said with a grin as he patted Niall on the back. There was no way i could get away from talking to him. He was going to force me to.

"Fine." I replied coldly as i gulped another shot down quickly. Harry shoved his hands in his pockets and began to walk towards the back entrance.

There was a black curtain covering a backroom for private parties that Harry led me into. The loud music was drowned out in here.

"We need to talk." Harry told me as i crossed my arms and looked up at him. His green eyes poured into mine as i bit my lip.

"No we don't." I replied coldly. He shook his head and let out a sigh.

"Ryder i need to tell you the truth." He told me which stopped me. I tilted my head to the left and waited for him to continue.

"I-I love you still. I think it's pretty obvious by now. I tried to hide it but i just cant. I can't get over you. When we were dating i was so nervous to bring you out in public. You have heard things that people have said about a girl that i haven't even dated. It would have killed me if you got hate." He said as he shook his head.

"You didn't bring me out because you were worried i would get hate?" I asked as he shrugged his shoulders.

"Sounds stupid, i know. But with your mom and everything..i just thought you deserved much better than that." He said as he reached out for my hand. I looked down as he squeezed it lightly.

"It is stupid." I replied as he frowned.

"I know, i shouldn't have kept you away from my life like that. I didn't want you to change Ry, I love you for you and i thought somehow that would break you." He muttered softly as he took a step closer.

"I refuse to believe you are over me." 

"Harry-" I started but he cut me off.

"No, you aren't over me. I can tell." He told me as i shook my head.

"I'm with Niall now." I told him as he shook his head.

"Fine, then kiss me one last time. Prove to me that you are over me." He said as i hesitated. I looked back up at him but it was too late. His warm hand grasped my cheek as his familiar lips met mine.

It was all too familar. His warm lips...the craving i have had for them to be on me again. I couldn't help but kiss him back. He was right, i wasn't over him. But that shouldn't matter. I'm with Niall now and i'm happy with him. 

"What the fuck is going on?" Niall's voice rang out as i quickly pushed Harry away from me. Niall stood in the entry way with two shots in his hand. His eyes were filled with disappointment and worry.

Holy fuck.