Don't say that you love me

Part 25

(Ryder pov) I blinked a couple of times as i looked at her. Did she just ask me what i think she did? She tilted her head to the left as she smiled.

"Um, what?" I asked her as she laughed lightly and ran her hand through her hair. 

"Niall or Harry?" She asked as i looked over at her. How on earth did she know about that? I though no one did!

"I'm dating Niall. I love Niall." I told her as she rolled her eyes and scooted closer to me.

"No, i know all about you and Harry. Harry told Louis and Louis told me." She told me as my eyes widened in alarm. I knew Louis knew! She tensed up a bit as she noted my alarm.

"Don't worry though, i would never tell anyone. Lou wouldn't either. Harry told him as a secret. I'm the only person that he told i promise." She told me as i ran my hands up and down my leg nervously.

What was I going to say to her? I didn't even know the answer yet myself. I mean, i loved Harry. Loved being past tense. But was i over him yet?

"I don't know." I told her as i looked down at my hands. She paused for a couple of seconds before answering.

"Well I think that they both love you. Harry obviously does. I'm sure Niall does too." She told me with a small smile as i nodded. 

"Yeah, he told me he did." I told her as she gasped with excitement.

"Did you say it back?" She asked excitedly as i bit my lip. I tried to play it off as nothing the first time he said it.

"No i didn't." I told her as she nodded and looked down at her hands.

"This must be tough. I know why you would still have feelings for Harry. It must have been a hard breakup." She told me as i nodded.

"But i also know that he was crushed when you started to date Niall." She told me as i looked up at her. He was crushed? He was the one who had decided not to call me. Why would he be so upset.

"But he broke up with me." I told her as she nodded and shrugged her shoulders.

"That may be true but we are talking about Harry here. There was a reason why Harry never brought you around places. It hurt him when very badly when you two broke up." She told me as my eyes widened.

How come he never told me any of this? All the time when i was sitting home alone depressed and sad he was too. 

"He was? I thought that he had gotten over me right away?" I asked her as she shook her head.

"No, it took him a very long time. Then when you started to date Niall things just clicked in his brain that he needed you back." She told me as i took in the information.

"But, i know that Niall loves you too. When he's with the boys he won't shut up about you. You are honestly all that he talks about and thinks about." She told me as i nodded. Why did i have to make such hard decisions in my life?

"I don't know." I told her as she reached for my hand.

"That's perfectly fine. This is very hard and i completely get it. I'm here for you whenever you want to talk." She told me as i smiled at her.

"Thank you, that means a ton to me. But i know i need to think about it. It would kill me if Niall found out about me and Harry now. I should have told him right away." I told her as she shrugged her shoulders.

"I understand why you didn't though. Imagine the tension between Harry and Niall if Niall knew." She told me as i thought about it. She was right, it would be terrible.

"It's hard, i know that. But it's a decision you have to make with your heart." She told me with a grin as i nodded.

"Thank you Eleanor. It means so much that you are talking to me about this. Harry can't know that you know though." I told her as her eyes widened.

"Oh my dear! I know! Louis can't know that i talked to you about it or else he would kill me! I just wanted you to know i'm here for you!" She told me with a smile as i grinned back.

"Thank you, that means so much to me. I need to get going though, i told Niall i would call him later today." I told her as she nodded. She stood up and wrapped her arms around me tightly.

"If you ever need me give me a call! Louis gave me your number so i'll send you a text." She told me with a smile as i nodded.

"Alright, that sounds good! Thank you!" I told her as she nodded.

"Anytime!" She said as she walked me towards the door.

Eleanor was right, it was a hard decision. But i needed to choose. It would kill Niall if i walked away with Harry. But at the same time, it was killing Harry to see me with Niall. I had no idea what to do.

I walked down the street quietly as i passed the coffee shop again. I paused outside as i looked in. Ali wasn't working anymore. Her shift must have ended already.

 I sighed as i continued back to my place. It was already nearly 5  and i was exhausted. Yesterday was so tiring.

Harry told me that he would get my car back to me somehow and sure enough, there it was when i got home.

My car was parked in my driveway as if i had never left. I shook my head with a small grin as i made my way up my steps.

I pulled my door open and walked in. It was quiet as usual. I guess that was a benefit of living alone all the time. I walk to my couch and lay down as i yawn. I was exhausted. I reach into my pocket to pull out my phone. I needed to call Ali and apologize.

Just as i was about to dial her number my phone began to ring. I looked down as Niall's name came across my screen. I bit my lip as i answered the call.

"Hey babe." I said into my phone as i yawned. 

"Hey." He said softly. What was the matter with him?

"Are you alright?" I asked him as he paused for a couple of seconds.

"Niall?" I asked again as he cleared his throat lightly.

"We need to talk babe." He told me as my eyes grew wide. Shit.