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When I woke up in the morning, I stole a glance at my chair, hoping that maybe Louis had fallen asleep there. But he was gone. I just closed my eyes and went back to sleep, still feeling worn out – emotionally and physically – from last night.
I was awakened much later to Danielle prodding me. "Ms. Ashten," she said, shaking me by the shoulder.
I grumbled and she shook me again. I groaned, "What time is it?"
"It's 11:30," she said. I was shocked that it was so late. "Are you feeling okay? Your mother wants to know if you're sick."
Sure, so she can stay as far away from me as possible. I'd never really admitted it to myself before, but it hurt that she didn't take care of me when I was sick. Having Louis take care of me so tenderly made me think of what I'd missed out on.
I didn't really want to talk to anyone today, so I just lied and said I was feeling under the weather. I asked Danielle to bring my meals to my room.
After she left, I stood up and stretched. I went over and sat in my chair, remembering every moment of last night with Louis. At first, it was humiliating, knowing I'd been so unprepared to face what that part of New York City had to offer. But I was also grateful for Louis' watchful eye. He'd been looking after me the whole time. If he hadn't been, I had no idea what Harry would have done to me.
I shuddered at the thought of that monster forcing himself on me, and suddenly I wanted Louis' arms around me again. I closed my eyes and recalled the feeling of his skin against my face as I hid from the terror I'd just faced. His soft voice in my ear, telling me I was safe.
I was startled when Danielle came back in, carrying my lunch on a silver tray. She set it down and spread everything out on my little table in the opposite corner of the room.
"Thank you," I said, and she gave me a rather stunned look, then left.
I sat down and picked at the food. I wasn't really hungry. I took a few sips of the strong coffee and started to feel a little more alert.
I decided to take a hot bath, thinking I might feel more hungry once I'd awakened all the way. I drew the water and stepped into my round tub, sitting down in the warm suds. I sat up as the tub filled, but when the water reached my chest, I laid down, letting the water completely envelope me. I sighed deeply. It felt so relaxing, I just wanted to lie there forever.
Eventually, the water cooled off and I started to wash up, I poured my favorite bath gel onto my puff and made lots of suds. I started scrubbing slowly from my neck, down my shoulders and arms, across my chest, and what I could reach of my back. I squirted a little more gel onto the puff and continued downwards. As I scrubbed lower, between my legs, I stopped scrubbing and moved my fingers around a little, over my bare skin. I was familiar with my body, but I hadn't really explored, or experimented, much. I just couldn't grasp the concept of sex being appealing. I seriously couldn't imagine letting any man be so close to me, even Richard. Maybe especially Richard.
