The Underground

Today's Honorary Chapter

THIS IS A SPOOF CHAPTER!

Author's Note: This chapter was published on April Fool's Day 2015. Prepare yourselves for a glimpse into my deranged brain. Oh, and be forewarned, this contains just a little naughtiness.

Since this is not a real chapter - if you want to skip it, you can, and you will not miss anything except some laughs. :D

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The next day, Louis accompanied me to my appointment to have my stitches removed. Preston drove, of course, because he still worked for me, but also because I secretly want to keep him enslaved to me and me alone for the rest of his days. Liam, Veronica, Danielle, and Zayn came along, too, just in case we ran into Richard again. In fact, they all signed a contract agreeing to accompany me everywhere from now on because I was weak on my own, and I needed their strength to help me through every situation I would face from now on. Yes, basically I made them all my bodyguards.

When we got to the appointment, I found out that I would be seen by a new doctor. He opened the door and my eyes practically fell from their sockets. Holy hot, blonde Irish bombshell! I practically fainted as his intoxicating scent wafted in before him, and I felt certain that a spell had been cast over me because I couldn't tear my eyes away from the luscious specimen standing before me.

"Hello, I'm Dr. Niall Horan," he schmoozed. "And who might you be?" He picked up my hand and kissed it. Louis lurched forward, but I held him at bay.

"I've got this, Lou," I said confidently. I turned to the doctor and replied, "I'm Ashten Norwood, of the Long Island Norwoods. Pleased to make your acquaintance, Doctor. If I'm not mistaken, you're the gardener who did my friend...oops, I meant did some work for my friend a few years back."

"Veronica? Yes, she was lovely, but I always secretly hoped I would see you again. I've only wanted you ever since the first time I laid eyes on you."

"What the hell-" Louis began, but I stopped him again.

"Louis, dear, why don't you wait for me outside. I think I'll be okay."

As soon as the door closed behind him, Niall's lips landed on mine, gliding them over mine in an expert fashion, making all the blood in my body rush to my...um, my face, yeah, my face.

When he finally pulled away from the mind-blowing kiss, I said, "I have a confession to make. I've always hoped I would run into you again, too, because damn! You are hot as fuck!"

"Speaking of fuck," he said with a wink.

I dug into my purse and gave him my card. "Meet me at my house at 8:00."

He removed the stitches without a bit of pain, or at least I didn't notice any pain because he had one hand burning into my thigh and his tongue was down my throat.

When I returned to the waiting room, Louis' face was red with fury. "What the hell was that all about?" He demanded.

"Oh, relax," I told him. "Niall and I are old friends. You're still my main squeeze."

He looked like he didn't quite believe me, but he took my hand anyway. But then I asked him to carry me because, well, my leg did hurt just a tiny bit, but my knees were so weak from Niall fondling me that I didn't trust myself to make it to the elevator.

When we returned home, I invited everyone inside.

The Queen of the Damned, AKA my mother, approached us in the foyer. "What in god's name is all this racket? What were you thinking, Ashten, by bringing these hoodlums back here and raising the roof like a bunch of common scoundrels!"