Spencer sat in the waiting room with his head in his hands. A part of him wanted the team there, so they could provide him some sort of comfort but the other part knew he wouldn't believe their words of encouragement. He also didn't want them to see him crying.
Spencer rubbed his eyes to try and stop the tears from falling but nothing worked. He kept running every scenario through his brain and nothing was pleasing to him. All he could do was sit there. He had never felt so useless before.
He just wished that everything could go back to the way it was, to two nights ago when you were both laying in bed. His head was on your chest and he was laying on top of you, wrapped around your smaller body. He hugged you tightly that night, kissing your collarbone and hearing your soft giggles accompanied by the calm beating of your heart.
Why couldn't he notice this before? He was a genius! How did he not pick it up when you mentioned a headache? Why couldn't he be a good boyfriend and ask more questions? Why didn't he try harder?
Spencer dropped his head into his lap and laced his hands behind his head. Maybe if he noticed earlier then the doctors could've treated you and you would've gotten better with raised odds. Maybe if he didn't completely disregard the incident on the case where the unsub attacked you. Maybe if he-
"Reid?"
Spencer looked up at the sudden voice, seeing Derek stand before him. It had to of been late. Or early in the morning- Spencer could not tell. Why was he here?
"Kid," Derek sat down next to his best friend and brought his arm around his shoulder. "You can't be here alone."
"What if she doesn't make it Morgan? I can't lose her, I won't lose her. I won't accept it." His voice broke as he choked down a sob.
Derek frowned looking over at his best friend. He was right on the edge and just one more push in the wrong direction would send him spiraling. He brought Spencer's head over to his shoulder, rubbing his hand up and down on his arm. Even if he could muster up some sort of reassurance Spencer would just counter with statistics and probability.
"She's strong, we know that. Determined as hell, we know that." Derek smiled. "Let's just focus on what we do know alright?" He felt Spencer slowly nod and they both fell into silence.
By the eight hour mark Spencer had only gotten up twice. Coffee and the bathroom. His mind was so focused on you he ignored the grumbling of his stomach and the droopiness of his eyes. He didn't want to fall asleep in fear you wouldn't be there when he woke up.
Noticing the dark circles, Derek tried to get Spencer to go home and get sleep but nothing worked so he gave up. He put himself in Spencer's shoes for a moment, knowing he would do the same. He rarely left the broken boy's side because you were like a sister to him.
And partially because he blamed himself. Derek knew he shouldn't of but maybe if he went with you to the basement when you called out then you would be back, safely in Spencer's arms. He had heard you he just had another hidden room to search. He knew the unsub targeted women of higher power and an FBI agent? Perfect opportunity.
Both his and Spencer's thoughts were interrupted by Garcia's heels clacking against the hospital floor.
"My sweetness how are you?" Derek stood up and accepted Garcia's hug.
"Things could be a lot better."
Garcia pulled away and looked down at Spencer, who had yet to acknowledge her presence. She went to walk over to him when a nurse timidly approached the group.
"Are you Spencer?"
Spencer's head looked up at the brunette nurse. He furrowed his brows but nodded, verbally responding to ease her confusion.
