Gintama x Reader One Shots

Abuto x Reader: The Benefits of Having a Yato Husband

"I think my boyfriend is the cutest person in the world!"

(F/N) sighed. This was why she rarely ate lunch in the mess hall. She hadn't even been sitting with her coworkers for five minutes, and they were already talking about love.

"I still don't get what you see in that guy," another coworker sighed.

"Yeah, well what do you see in your boyfriend?"

"Well he's smart, for one thing, and funny, too."

The first coworker huffed, and (F/N) did her best to eat as quietly as possible, trying not to draw their attention, but it was too late.

"What about you (F/N)-san. Are you seeing anyone right now?"

(F/N) tensed.

"I...I'm married, actually."

"Wait a minute, who..."

They froze, and she saw the dawning horror in their eyes as they remembered.

"That's right! You're married to the Seventh Division's second-in-command!"

(F/N) sank down lower in her seat, as if that would somehow make them forget she existed. Every time she talked to her coworkers in the Harusame, this came up, and the conversation always went the same way.

"Are you out of your mind?"

"Please calm down," (F/N) groaned. "It's not that big a deal..."

"Not that big a deal?" one of them shouted. "That guy's a yato they're savages!"

"No, they're not...well, okay, like seventy percent of them are, but still..."

By some miracle, her coworkers seemed to hear the plea in her voice, and sat back down in their seats.

"Well, if you say so," the one next to her muttered, "but I still don't get it. Why the heck would you want to marry a yato?"

"Well..."

~o0o~

"Let's see...that seems to be almost everything on the list..."

(F/N) sighed, and strained to see over the giant pile of bags in her arms. It was rare for the Harusame to give her the day off, and she wasn't about to waste it.

She'd only just caught sight of the next item on the list—pickles—when her toe struck a rock. It barely hurt at all through her thick boots, but it did cause her to stumble, and the bag at the top of the mountain in her arms fell off.

Before it could hit the ground, however, someone caught it—Abuto, who she'd insisted on bringing with her.

"Isn't that a little heavy for you?" he asked. "Let me take a couple—"

"You'll take all of them? Thank you!"

Before he could protest, she shoved all the bags in his arms, and took off towards the grocery store.

"Hey!" he snapped. "Is this seriously why you brought me? Hey!"

"Not at all!" she shouted over her shoulder. "I just really enjoy your company! It's not like I planned this or anything!"

She turned back to the list, ignoring the sound of his sigh in the background.

"Goddammit...third time this month."