When We're Older- The Maze Runner (Newt)

last dance

POV's will be changing quite a bit from this point on

this song hurts my heart.

NEWT

I couldn't stop thinking about it. About what I did to Mae.

Despite the fact that I pushed her an hour ago, she had been rubbing the back of her head and pinching her eyes shut in pain ever since. The girl hit the counter pretty hard, I'm surprised she didn't get knocked out. But as I watched her, I noticed how her eyes were slightly glossed over, and she had to be leaning over or holding onto something or someone as she stood.

Whenever I looked at her, she met my eyes and she gave me a weak smile, telling me that she didn't blame me for what had happened. But I did. I blamed myself for pushing her, I blamed myself for putting her through the pain of knowing that I was going mad. Maybe if I hadn't told her, or shown her, then she wouldn't look like she was thinking of the worst possible situation every moment.

The sadness I've felt since the moment I laid hands on her has almost been unbearable. It took a lot to make me really upset, but when it came to Mae, and her safety, I was like a piece of glass just waiting to be shattered.

That's how I've been since I met her. Something about being the only girl around fifty or more guys flipped a switch in me that I didn't know was there. Before, I had just been existing. I was forced into a life I didn't want, trapped with no memory of a purpose. The only thing that had been keeping me going was the tiniest glimmer of hope that we would somehow find a way out of the Maze.

And then she came.

And she somehow figured out a way to make me feel happy for the first time in my life.

She gave me a purpose. Something to care about. Something to hope for.

I found myself biting off more than I could chew with her. Caring about someone who was so reckless. She made it her duty to protect everyone around her, without bothering to wonder if someone was protecting her. Any minute, she could take a wrong step, and could be captured or killed. And she didn't even think about that.

But deep down, I knew that she was so powerful that the only one that could kill her...was herself.

And now, she was trying to piece together the plan that we had made throughout the course of the day. Her delicate hand was over her eyes in a state of stress nobody could possibly understand. Papers fanned out in front of her while Gally and Tommy bickered about basically stealing Teresa. Their conversation was built on mutters, careful not to speak to loudly to interrupt those who were thinking.

I stared at her, holding my hands in a fist while my elbows were perched on the table. I was about five feet from Mae, wanting to keep my distance just in case something came over me again.

"Okay." She suddenly spoke, shutting everyone up immediately as we all listened to her. "So let me get this straight...I'm gonna be waiting with Bren in the bus while all of you guys go and get Minho?"

Tommy nodded. "And when we get the serum and get Minho, save the other kids, then we'll bring them to you guys. We'll all get on the bus and then that's where Fry comes in."

"Where the hell even is Minho?"

He paused before looking at Gally, who sighed and responded. "That's why we need Teresa. The plan is to get her back here, have her take out the stupid tracker things from the back of our necks so that we won't get detected when we go through the building..." He pushed his lips to the side and crossed his arms over his chest. "And maybe interrogate her in the process."