Counting Stars at Dawn

9: I Might End Up Choosing You

Artemis fluttered his eyelids as he regained consciousness, feeling like he was barely able to wake up from the deepest slumber he has ever had. He caught the scent of sandalwood and cologne and stirred in his position.

"Hades." Artemis mumbled sleepily.

He clung tightly to the warmth emanating from the front, and gradually started becoming aware that he was tightly wrapped by strong arms.

"Hmm." Artemis sighed as he opened his eyes half way.

"Sh, go back to sleep. You're not at your full energy yet." He heard a deep voice gently shush him to sleep and a hand petting his head.

Artemis exhaled, still sleepy as he cuddled the warmth and enjoyed the gentle untangling of his hair. Finally, he realized he was sleeping next to someone and fully woke up.

"What the hell?!" Artemis exclaimed at the person hugging him.

"It's me Arty." He heard Hades say.

He sounded different though, like he was apprehensive. Artemis freed himself from his embrace but when he tried to sit up he steadily felt pain all over his body erupt. Artemis hyperventilated as his limbs, torso, and rear started hurting all at once.

"Artemis!" Hades quickly sat up and held Artemis's shoulders. "Artemis please open your mouth, I have to kiss you."

"You are crazy if you think I'll let you kiss me now!" Artemis whimpered loudly as he felt the pain getting worse.

"Artemis please! Just trust me! I promise the pain will stop!"

With his eyes shut, Artemis parted his lips and he felt Hades press his. Somehow, that actually stopped his pain and he whimpered. Tears started falling down his cheeks and Artemis pressed his face to his palms. He cried, and Hades felt the guiltiest he's ever been in his entire life.

"Artemis I'm sorry. Please forgive me, I'm so sorry." Hades tried to hug him but Artemis pushed him away.

"STAY AWAY FROM ME!" Artemis screeched. He finally lifted his red, teary eyes. "WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU, WHY DID YOU DO THIS TO ME?!"

"I'm sorry Artemis, please, I beg you to forgive me!" Hades raised his voice as he kneeled on the ground, holding one of Artemis's hands.

Artemis quieted and saw the proud vampire beg for forgiveness on his knees. He was beyond confused. Why had Hades treated him so horribly, and why was he feeling so guilty?

Hades took a big inhale and stood up to go to the balcony. Without turning, he said:

"I'm sorry . . . I have to go back home now. I promise . . . to never do this ever again."

"Hades, I deserve to know why I was assaulted out of nowhere in the first place!" Artemis demanded.

Hades rubbed his face with his palms and ran a hand through his hair. He didn't know how to tell Artemis why he did that, there was no subtle way to say it.

He turned his body, still not lifting his gaze from the floor, for he was too ashamed. Artemis looked expectantly at him, frowning.

"I don't know how to tell you this Artemis." Hades whispered. "I . . . I couldn't stop myself. It just happens every now and then and I can't--"

"Hades you're not making any fucking sense. Tell me the damn truth already." Artemis stated.

Hades sighed and dared to look at Artemis. He was sitting on the edge of the bed with his arms crossed and a furious look on his face. He walked back to him and Artemis leaned back carefully. Hades took his hands in his own, and confessed:

"I'm in heat Artemis. I know . . . I know that is not an excuse. I'm not trying to excuse myself, I'm just telling you the truth. Do you know what I'm talking about?"

"Of course I don't." Artemis scoffed.

"Okay, vampires have mates."

"I know that much. If you have a mate what are you even doing here with me then?! You have a mate and I have a fiancée! You sicken me Hades Crow!"

"I don't have a mate Artemis! Will you just listen to me!"

Artemis frowned when he heard Hades. The majority of his mind didn't believe a single word.

"I don't have a mate, okay? I'm a pureblood, royal vampire." Hades looked sincerely at Artemis. "As odd as it sounds, in several ways, I'm different from normal vampires. One of the ways I differ, is when it comes to mates. Every vampire gets a mate, but royal ones don't. We have the liberty to choose our mates. B-But the downfall about it is that I will undergo breeding periods, or heats like this one, until I choose and mark a mate."

Artemis was trying to scan Hades' face for lying signs, but found none.

"The heats get progressively worse the more I wait to choose. Actually, in reality the more I avoid choosing one." Hades eyes lowered to the ground in shame. "I normally stay locked up in my room and just have sex with random people to pass it, but this time, I was there and I couldn't stop thinking about you.

Next thing I knew, I was already teleporting here through the few shadows of the daytime to find you. I couldn't stop myself Artemis, and I'm so sorry. I should've stopped, I hate these heats so much because I always lose more and more consciousness than I did the last time. I'm so sorry."

"You are such an asshole." Artemis laughed bitterly as tears fell down his cheeks.

Hades looked up confused at him.

"You toy with me from the start to entertain yourself with no other reason at all, leave for an entire week, and now you dare tell me you couldn't stop thinking about me?" Artemis sniffled and his voice broke.

"Arte--"

"I can't believe you Hades! Actually you know what, I can't believe myself! I can't believe I started thinking you weren't as egotistical as everyone in your kind! You're not special nor different! You're much worse than all of them together! Why couldn't you just stay away from me like you had all this time?!"

"Artemis, I couldn't stay away from you!" Hades spoke up. "That week I disappeared, I was trying to, but not because I got bored or something else. It was because I knew it was dangerous, but even then, it was already too late."

Artemis inhaled and looked at Hades. Hades grabbed his hand and placed it on his own cheek.

"I haven't chosen a mate for a reason." Hades shuddered. "I didn't want to make a commitment to someone because I just didn't think anyone was worth the feelings that come attached to it. The pain, the sorrow, the jealousy, the fear of not being good enough. The fear of ever losing that person. There's so much about vampire mates that scares me to death. I still can't make up my mind about it, but . . . "

Artemis widened his eyes when Hades kissed his hand gently and looked into his blue eyes with the utmost sincerity he had as he said:

"I might end up choosing you as my mate."

Artemis felt overwhelmed, his heart made a sudden leap with the notion of Hades' possible feelings, but his mind screamed for him to slap him across the face.

"I don't know if I love you yet, if I'm being fully honest." Hades continued. "But I know that if I spend more time with you, I will most definitely get a positive answer."

Artemis froze when Hades stood up to hug him. Soon though, Artemis melted and hugged him back tightly. 

This man was capable of unleashing all of his hidden desires, but also could make him doubt everything he believed in and thought he knew. His mind agonized constantly. Is Hades evil or good? Artemis couldn't choose either opinion because of his actions, but also because of the incessant battle of his heart and mind.

The sun set upon the two of them, leaving both uncertain as to the direction their relationship would now take. Staying friends, or even friends with benefits was now an awkward choice. But becoming lovers? It wasn't a viable one either as one of them was still bound to the ties of tradition.