A story that won't end | Hwang Hyunjin

44

Hyunjin's POV


(Next Day)


"Hyunjin, breakfast-" Inyeop


"I'm not gonna eat" 


"Why? You should. You didn't eat with us yesterday. Besides, Father is not here" Inyeop 


I want to kill him so bad. I want to fucking torture him as much as I can. 


"Alright" 


Inyeop tapped my shoulder and left my room.


As soon as I heard the door closed, my tears started falling. Being with Xea and meeting her was the best thing that ever happened to me and that helped me recover from the things that Daeshim caused. I was able to sleep at night with no tears, I am able to smile and do things that I never did before because of her. But why the fuck is this happening?


Can't I be happy? 


Just seeing Xea makes me feel guilty for what Father did and I know am also at fault. My Father killed her Father and I was there. I was there when her Father died. I saw everything but I never did anything to help her get revenge. I never did anything to make my Father pay. Why the fuck now?!


I just want to be happy...


I wiped my tears as I carried my bag and went downstairs, to the kitchen. I saw my siblings eating already and talking about some serious matter. I sat quietly and started eating without even greeting them.


"Good morning" Tiffany smiled


"Are you okay? You look like you have a problem" Inyeop asked


"Bae Wonshik"


They both looked at me with shock on their faces. I looked at them and tried to read their expressions but everything is a mess in my mind. I can't think clearly and it feels like if I push myself even more, I will pass out.


"B-Bae Wonshik?" Inyeop asked

"Hyunjin? How do you know Bae Wonshik?" Tiffany asked as well


"Stop pretending like you don't know him. You two obviously know what happened. I already know about it. I thought I was going to be happy again but it seems like I'm not allowed to be happy at all. You know how happy I am to meet Xea and finally found myself being happy again, being able to do things that I never did. I thought, I was fine and I don't revenge anymore. I don't need to fill my heart with pain from the past and decided to forget everything. B-But why..." 


I am not able to control my tears and let them fall one by one. 


"You two should've told me sooner! Do you know how much it hurts when you don't want to lose that someone but being guilty for what happened in the past? I don't want to leave her, I don't want to be guilty but both choices will torture me forever! It fucking hurts... I should've known sooner and t-that..." I wiped my tears and took a deep breath "I-I will able to stop myself from falling in love. I don't want to lose her... but I also don't want to be selfish"


"Hyunjin, it wasn't your fault or Xea's-" Inyeop


"I was there! I saw everything!" 


"H-Hyunjin" Tiffany called and started crying


"I told you it wasn't your fault!" Inyeop shouted back


"That's my Father, we share the same blood! I have his surname! He is in my birth certificate! He is married to Mom! That guy killed Xea's Father! His fucking friend! How am I going to tell myself that it wasn't my fault? I-I just want to be happy and be at peace, but why things kept going against me... Why?"


"Hyunjin, stop it" Inyeop whispered


"Am I right-"


"I said stop it" Inyeop repeated


"You don't understand me!"


"What the fuck do you want?! Do you think you are the only one who experienced the same thing?! That was the fucking reason why me and Suzy ended up parting ways! It's because of him! We are supposed to get married but Father killed Wonshik! Do you know how much it hurts me?! We have the same experience! I've been there! I experienced the same thing where you will feel that everything is not going on your way! The feeling of being lonely! I've been there! After what happened to their Father... S-Suzy chose to expose Father in order for Mom to be safe! She tried to save her! But F-Father tried to kill her too!" Inyeop shouted and started crying as well


"Please, you two. Stop" Tiffany begged and stood between us


"Suzy talked to me about telling you two but it was my fault for rejecting her suggestion. I-I was just happy to see you smiling and I don't want to take Xea away from you. I don't want to hurt you! T-That's the least I can do to help, to let you and Xea... Was it wrong to see you happy?" Inyeop


"Inyeop" Tiffany whispered


"Don't you ever question me. I have the most painful past than you" Inyeop shook his head and went upstairs. 


Tiffany sighed and wiped her tears "You two... I know it was hard but let's not be weak. Don't let Father beat us. We are stronger than him. We will get through this" she smiled to me and hugged me tight but let go after a few seconds "You go to school, I will talk to Inyeop. It's going to be fine" she nodded at me and went upstairs as well


Why does it have to be us? I was hoping that it wasn't Daeshim. I don't want Xea to be hurt every time she sees me. I don't want to see her cry...

because it hurts.