just friends

13

raelyn
"i'm honestly so tired of pretending i don't feel anything" maddy groaned while burying her face into her pillows. "like i'm tired of pretending i'm not upset that he literally controls my life"

"break up with him" i shrugged while i texted billie.

i was complaining to her about maddy and her relationship problems. 

"i cant though" she frowned. "i can fix him"

"he is a terrible fucking person" i cackled. "plus he is a male with a forearm tattoo, specifically a lion tattoo. that radiates daddy issues!"

"but i-"

"my god madelyn" i cut her off. "you're always asking him for permission to do things. that's not how relationships work! you're a dumbass for staying with him"

she began crying and i just comforted her.

this sparked something inside of me though. i don't know what it was but i wanna talk to billie about something...

you should know

i kinda wanna tell her i like her?

i mean the other night when i asked her 'tell me you feel it too' i kinda pussied out. i didn't wanna tell her i have feelings because she just stood quiet and went back to kissing me.

maybe it's to early for her to have feelings you know?

she just got out of a horrible relationship so i understand why she acted that way the other night.

i'm pretty sure she knew what i was talking about though.

i asked billie to come over and she said yeah. i do wanna talk to her about you know, but i'm kinda nervous.

i don't like talking about my feelings.

"enough of me crying" maddy wiped her eyes and sniffled. "what's going on with you and your billie friend"

"nothing" i let out a small laugh.

maddy sent me a look and shook her head. "rae" she chuckled. "you're my sister and i know when there's something"

fuck it

"oh my god" i groaned while falling back on her bed. "this bitch tripped me or some shit"

"what do you mean?" she made a face.

"you know i never fall for people!" i wailed my hands around. "plus me falling this fast?? this motherfucker tripped me!"

"awe is raelyn in love?" maddy teased me.

"i am not" i mumbled.

"it's cute that you finally like someone" she told me. "i don't know why you avoid it though"

"i don't know" i shrugged. "i just don't like being vulnerable to someone... i mean look at you!"

"hey!" she smacked my leg. "don't compare me to your crush"

"she's not my crush" i mumbled while pushing her arm.

"mhm" maddy sent me a look. "i saw yall kissing the other day, shut up"

"what-" i felt my cheeks redden.

"and i walked into you two cuddling while yall slept" she smirked. "you're in love rae, l-o-v-e!"

"i'm not" i huffed while sitting up to leave her room. "leave me alone"

"plus i've seen the way you look at her!" maddy shouted as i left her room. "just accept it rae! you like her!"