Inexplicable Dream Team one-shots

No Reasonable Context Could Explain This // DreamNotFound

!inspired by the DNF short story "Impossible Words" by Arsenicarose on AO3!

| platonic & romantic |

[3011 words]

**Content warning: contains swearing and mentions of sex, but there is no smut! :) also there is some casual stripping but I promise it's not sexual**

Summary: The first words your soulmate will say to you in person appear somewhere on your body. For faceless Minecraft Youtuber Dream, the words appear in an unlucky location. Even more distressing, he learns his soulmate's first greeting to him will be far different from anything he could have predicted.

***

When Dream's twenty-first birthday arrived, a tingling sensation burned across his unsuspecting cheek as he idled in his office-bedroom. At first, he lifted a hand from resting on his desk surface to scratch absently at what he believed was a minor itch. His fingertips jerked when an arc of static electricity flashed from his cheek.

"What the hell?" Dream muttered, launching upwards from his chair. His knees narrowly missed slamming into the underside of his desk as he stumbled toward the restroom. His cat Patches meowed with worried confusion as she trotted after him.

Even before he reached the restroom, he realized what was happening; this was it. This was the moment. Dream's soulmate words had appeared across his neck and face: two disconcertingly visible locations.

All of Dream's preparation was for naught. The years he spent bracing himself for any number of potential words or phrases to appear on his skin had not readied him well enough for this.

On a person's birthday between the ages of eighteen and twenty-two, their soulmate's first words appeared upon their bodies. The particular words which would appear on one's skin were completely unpredictable, and made no sense out-of-context. The most common phrases to appear were "hello", "nice to meet you", and "what's your name?", but Dream had heard intriguing stories of phrases such as "I love you so much" or "fuck you" appearing on one's skin.

Dream's eagerness to read his soulmate words vanished as he gawked at himself in the mirror. He read the words, then read them again in utter disbelief. How was this possible? What could this even mean?

Bold black letters across his forehead and cheek read,

*LOUD MOAN*

Confusion slammed him first. Horror gripped him second.

No reasonable context could explain this. How was Dream supposed to interpret that?

Experimentally Dream leaned forward, turned the sink handle, and splashed cold water from the faucet upon his cheek. When he turned off the sink and straightened again, the words had neither disappeared nor faded.

As he learned from his research, soulmate words were permanent.

With a shuddering sigh, Dream thanked his luck that he was already a faceless Youtuber, so none of the Dream Team fandom would view the unfortunate phrase tarnishing his neck and freckled cheeks before he was ready. After the initial shock disappeared, helplessness overwhelmed him. What if people saw him in public like this? What would his parents think? What would his friends say?

Bullying another person for their soulmate words was inconsiderate, but surely no passerby could resist snickering at the lewd words across Dream's cheek? Some people would assume his soulmate's and his relationship would be an opposites-attract situation, where one inappropriate person would mismatch their partner's virtue. Undoubtedly, however, other people would assume Dream's soulmate and him were both sluts.