Heartbreak Journey

Life Lesson

Yoon Se Ri

Do you know how much time you spend to soothe your heart when you miss someone? I say... too much. But the heart needs it so the body complies.

My mind keeps ordering me to remember the memories. From the worst one - our meet cute? - to the best one - you are a promise, Yoon Se Ri.

My thumb keeps scrolling through the gallery. Scrolling the gallery in my phone has become a habit because I miss him. So much. All the time. Like.. how can I not?

Coffee means Ri Jeong Hyeok. Breakfast reminds me of Ri Jeong Hyeok. Work... I legally making time to think about him when I work which takes like 50% percent of my day. Sleep means dreaming about him. See? All the time.

My lips say his name every single time I pray. Please God, make Ri Jeong Hyeok the one for me. Please God, let him find me. Faster if possible.

My feet bring me around every morning for a jog. Something I never do before. Just because he jogs everyday, and so with jogging my chance of incidentally meeting him increases.

My hands keep writing letters to him. Words I want to say to him but don't have the chance yet. And of course writing these letters keeps me off the track.

Yoon Se Ri, focus. You have a book to write. The ending won't write itself. Stop writing a letter you won't send anyway. Stop writing those same three words over and over again.

I. Miss. You.

Everything in life always has two sides. Yin and Yang. Black and white. Light and dark. Joy and sorrow. Love and hate. Which is exactly my point. It is noted that one of the best thing in life is having someone worth waiting for. The downside? It comes with waiting which is kind of one of the worst thing in life.

But fate is not about waiting, it's about believing. So, although it's already past two months since our parting in the airport, I am still optimistic for Ri Jeong Hyeok to find me. I mean... I gifted him the book and by the way he talked about my book, I would think that he already read the book and found my note. But I guess, I'm wrong. Either he hasn't read the book thus he hasn't read my note or he found the note but changed his mind about finding me.

But fate is about believing. No one can take one that is destined for you. I remember reading that quote somewhere.

So back to waiting then. Eh, I mean... believing.

***

When I don't think about Ri Jeong Hyeok, I am guest staring at some radio show and tv programs. When I don't think about Ri Jeong Hyeok, I am preparing a book signing event for my alma mater, Seoul National University, later this month. It is an opportunity, as I am to be a keynote speaker at Annual Media Conference held by Communication Department.

Thinking about how busy I am going to be for the next few months, I'm glad that I took those two weeks vacation. Between deadline for my next book, tons of guest staring in radio or tv program and guest speaker at several conference, it sure can keep me from wondering what Ri Jeong Hyeok is doing all the time.

"Kim Min Ah! Stop booking me for so many events. I've said it a few times, I'm not a pop princess. When do you expect me to write? At night? When I'm already exhausted?"

"What can I do? They call me and beg me saying they're gonna get fired if you don't come."

"You do realize that it's probably an empty threat, right? There's plenty other writers out there."

"But only one with such huge fan base and influence like you. Do you know your social media engagement rate? It's borderline 7% which is sky high. Even TV program and radio show use some analytics like that to decide on their guests. That's why they are really keen on having you. And I can't reject it. It's gonna build your brand." She passionately describes the trend now.