sister of the wolf | s. snape

thirty-six | blame

It had been a month since the last mission. The one where Elise and Sirius slipped in amongst Death Eaters to thwart them. The one where Elise got to see Severus again for the first time in two years.

November had arrived, the cold weather along with it. The Marauders all agreed to ignore Christmas this year entirely... It was a far too stressful and dangerous time to worry over presents. And Elise was glad to get an opportunity to go home and see her parents and not fret over anyone else.

It had been so long since she'd seen her sickly mother. The doctors said Hope Lupin didn't even have a year left in her. Remus and Elise desperately needed to visit her, even though their mother urged them to live their lives and not fuss over her.

Elise already began packing away some nice clothes in her suitcase to spend a few days at their parents' home. Far too early to be packing, but she was eager.

She and Remus had gotten a little apartment on the other side of town from Grimmauld Place once she'd graduated. The siblings wanted to stay close, but keep their parents safe. So, to do that, they moved away from home. The last thing they needed was a Death Eater to find out where their Muggle mother lived.

"El," Remus sighed from her doorframe, the sudden sound making her jump. "We're not seeing mum and dad for well over a month. Why are you packing already?"

She rolled her eyes and shut her suitcase, returning it to beneath her bed.

"You can never be too prepared, dear brother," she said dramatically, turning and leaning against her bedpost to smirk at him.

"Oh, but you already have enough baggage, dear sister," he mocked, raising a brow. "So why make more?"

Elise groaned and snatched a pillow from her bed, throwing at at him - he caught it, which just irritated her more.

"And what is that supposed to mean?"

Her brother grinned and sat down on her bed, placing her pillow back where it belonged before staring up at her.

"It means," he began with a sigh. "That Snape joined the Order awhile ago now and... You still look at him like you did in school."

She scoffed and sat down beside him, shaking her head.

"So what, Remus? So what if I still love him?"

"Does he still love you?"

Elise ran her fingers through her hair, squeezing her eyes shut for just a moment before looking at him and shrugging. Her brother couldn't help but notice the pain and confusion in her eyes.

"I see," he said softly, placing a comforting hand on her back. "Well... He's on our side now. I think you should figure that all out."

"No," she responded quickly, waving the idea off. "Same side or not, we're in a war. I'm an Auror and he's a double agent. We both have too much going on to worry about that right now..."

"But you're worried about it anyway, Elise." He said, making eye contact with her. He smiled sadly at her. "And... It's war, you're right. But because of that, you shouldn't leave anything left unsaid. Any day could be our last."

She didn't want to admit he was right, but... He was. Like usual.

"Fine," she sighed. "I'll talk to Severus tomorrow. After our Order meeting."

-

"That will be all, thank you for your time, everyone." Albus said, his blue eyes glinting as they gazed over everyone at the table: Elise, Remus, Sirius, Peter, Severus, Alice, Frank, Marlene, Moody, and a few others.

It made Elise's heart ache to not see Lily and James sat side-by-side at the table, but she knew they were in hiding for their family's safety. She just wished she knew when she could see them again.

After dismissing the meeting, Dumbledore and a few others departed the place, but some remained to talk amongst each other. This was her chance to have an actual conversation with Severus. She was nervous, to say the least.

"-I bloody miss that bastard Peeves!" Sirius rambled on to Elise and Peter, who had stayed sat at the table with him. However, the former hadn't quite been paying attention, instead having her eyes fixed on a black-haired boy to make sure he didn't leave yet.

"I don't!" Peter retorted. "That damn ghost was a menace!"

"He was hilarious, how could you!"

Elise then began to tune out the conversation once again as she watched Severus end his conversation with Mundungus Fletcher and begin one with Emmeline Vance.

She was a couple years older than them and had been a Ravenclaw at Hogwarts. That was all Elise really knew about her... Other than that she was very pretty.

Emmeline flashed a bright smile and placed a hand on Severus' arm as they talked, causing Elise's face to feel hot.

What the fuck? Am I actually jealous?

She couldn't see Severus' reactions, as his back was turned to her, but it's not like he was pushing Emmeline away or telling her to stop. Her stomach felt like it was doing somersaults and her palms felt clammy.

Then she heard a brief chuckle from Severus, followed by Emmeline's obnoxious giggling and touching his arm some more.

Nope. Nope. I'm leaving.

Elise stood up abruptly, causing her chair to creak loudly across the wooden floor and Severus, Emmeline, Peter, and Sirius to look at her with confusion.

"Hey, Bandit, you alright? You don't look so good, mate." Sirius inquired, standing up beside her and resting a hand on her shoulder, his brows pulled together with concern.

"I'm fine, I'm fine." Elise urged, brushing his hand away. "I just... Need to go rest." She reassured, giving him a tiny smile and rushing out of the kitchen where their meetings were held.

Once outside, she Apparated back to her bedroom in her apartment and sat upon her bed, trying to calm herself down.

Was he really over her? Had he given up on waiting? They'd been in the same proximity multiple times in the last month since they first reunited, and he'd never spoken more than a couple casual words to her. He'd shown little to no interest in her existence.

Of course he's moved on, she thought with a huff as she laid back on her bed. It's been two bloody years. We were kids back then. I can't blame him for losing feelings...

But even though she knew that she truly couldn't blame him, she also couldn't help the tears sliding down her face.

-

A/N: So, uh, I don't know if anyone noticed, but I changed the face claim for Severus. It's now Adam Driver. :o

Idk, I just feel like he suits him better and people were kinda... weird about me using Ben Barnes for him. Which I understand, but I just felt this was the better option.

As I've said before, you can still picture WHOEVER you want as the characters in this story. My face claims are just how I picture them!

Anyway, hope you're all still liking the story! Things pick up soon!