Temporary Love

Part 9: Stress And Anger

I didn't get any sleep the last two nights.

Sunday, Helen decided to get the morning after pill. I went with her of course and I paid forty bucks for the damn thing- but it didn't settle my nerves.

After that we went our separate ways and I tried to study. I really did- but my mind was on the possible child Helen could be carry.

We didn't tell the others what had transpired.

Not that we had sex.

And not that I broke the condom that was obviously not the right size.

Foolishness kept me up and now, walking into Anatomy, I head to my seat sluggishly and find Helen sitting there as if everything is normal.

"Good morning." She says cheerily, but I can still hear that slight sliver of fear rising in her voice.

"Morning. How um....how are you...ya know?" I can't say it. The dread won't stop boiling over inside me- but I can't let her know that.

"Tired....but good. You?"

"Same." The awkwardness is worse than before. It feels as if we've never even met before.

Just two strangers forced into sitting next to each other on a city bus because everywhere else is full.

"Any um... side effects?" That pill could cause nausea, dizziness, vomiting, and a bunch of other things. I'd feel bad if she had any.

"Tad bit of nausea...but it was okay." I weakly smile and she opens her notebook to the next available page.

How can she be so calm and normal right now?

Isn't she freaking out?

Yeah, she took the pill- but the thought of a baby still possibly in the near future is making me want to throw up.

"I'm sorry to hear that."

"It's alright...So, how was your Sunday night?"

"It um...it was okay."

"Get some studying done?" No- not an ounce.

"Yeah... oh yeah- quite a bit."

"Good- Garvey told me when I came in that we're having a pop quiz. Though it isn't very popish is she tells someone about it." She smiles and opens her notes.

Pop Quiz?!

A pop quiz!!!

I didn't fucking study Saturday or Sunday because she took up my time!

"Piece of Cake..." I lie through my teeth and she smiles. Before I can pull my notes out to study- Garvey comes in and begins the class.

Fuck me- I hope I can do this.

***

I couldn't do it.

I couldn't think straight- let alone actually recall the answers to questions I didn't even know were coming because I didn't get to look at my notes!!!

Sitting in my seat, not even ready to leave yet because I'm still in shock- I stare at my laptop screen where my tallied score is devastating.

"How'd you d-owww- what the Hell, Max?" Garvey says as she comes around the table to look at my score of 0/40. I look up at her and just want to cry and beg for a second chance. "0? Like a legit 0? What's this about?"

"I...I don't..."

"Did you look over the material at all? I told you this year wasn't going to be a walk in the park like all our previous classes. This year is the big deal- the make it or break it and if you keep getting 0's you're not going to make it."