Book – Love Gone
Author: felicia_rutendo
Reviewer: Mystery_Twins_LTD
Introduction
Love Gone, by @Felicia_rutendo begins with an optimistic question; is your first love meant tolast forever? Although the paradox of the story is that it takes some time answering that question, whilealso feeling as if it's rushing to reach an answer in record time. Focusing on a pair of sisters, Jeani, theyounger is feeling the single slump. Briana is introduced as the caring, beautiful, put together older sisterwith of course a boyfriend Jeanie envies. Or, at least she's envious of the idea of having a boyfriend. Thefirst three chapters mostly establish the ordinary world Jeanie inhabits; homelife, high school, best friendclique, all the standards. What could carry this story forward is the mostly loving relationship betweentwo sisters and how they answer the author's opening question.
Analysis
Although not typical of novellas, the story of Love Gone is told in the present tense. This seemsfitting thematically considering that modern high school life stories seem to exist in a bubble: the worldends after graduating highschool and it doesn't really matter what existed before. An area of improvementhowever is that the story is heavily driven by plot. In the first scene, Jeanie is introduced to us momentsbefore heading out on a family jog around the neighborhood. We're shown what she does to get ready, thesteps she takes to go outside, and the jog itself. There's little time given to bring any depth to where thestory takes place. This could simply be the author's choice of style, and that's fine. Although one couldargue that to answer first love's longevity, or who one loves, or why, taking a moment to examine theenvironment one's character(s) live in adds depth to that character's story.
Reflection
I generally enjoyed this story despite its fast pace. The author is telling the story they want to telland the audience can choose to run at the pace of their story, or not. Despite rushing through the firstchapter, we introduce our main characters, and the central conflict of getting a boyfriend. If the authorwished to edit this story, I'd recommend taking some time to show the audience who the characters are inaddition to what they're doing. More so than correcting the punctuation around the dialogue and a fewconsistent grammatical errors, I'd encourage the author to let their story breathe. Take a few sentencesfrom rushing through the action of what's happening and paint the scene. Show the audience how it looks,sounds, feels to be in Jeanie and Briana's world.
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