Wormers' Reviews & Editing Shop

▍❯ Boyfriend Scenario [Rights & (male)Punks ]

Book Title : Boyfriend Scenario [Rights & (male)Punks ]

Reviewer : felicia_rutendo
Author : MeowMeow422

Cover: 3/5
The cover is cute and attractive. However I feel that the cover should relate to the book or title at least. At first glance I would think you're going to write on what's on the cover. Any random reader would conclude that as well and maybe not pick it. And lose out on a good story.

Title: 4/5
It's a cute title and an eye-catching one at that. And I suppose people would pick it because well who doesn't want the perfect boyfriend scenario. And never let it be a click bait title because those just put a reader off. 

Summary: 4/5
Its interesting and I would definitely pick it. But the question that immediately popped into my head was why did the author not write different books into different stories. But I would love to see how the author manages to write about the characters without confusing the reader.

Grammar/Vocabulary: 10/15
To be honest the change in tense threw me off. It was distracting as I was going from present to past tense as I noted from the very first paragraph. But this is nothing a little editing can't fix. I would also like to point out some use of words which could have been written better for example where you wrote, "busily talking" when what you could have said was "busy on the phone talking", that was a bit distracting as I found myself trying to sound out the words trying to figure out is this right or not. Another example is of when you wrote, "couldn't help the judgmental look" when what you could have said was "you couldn't help but scowl". As I was reading the following chapters I found some paragraphs choppy and hard to read. But a little editing can fix that.

Use of literary techniques: 5/10
Question is what are literary techniques? How do they make a story better? I could hardly see any. They shouldn't be too many or too little. They need to be just right to add a little spice to the story.

Character development: 10/15
Your story is lacking in character development. What captures readers is show not tell. They just don't want he was tall, dark they want a perfect description he was about 6 foot with broad shoulders, he had a complexion close to a dark brown with deep blue eyes you get?. Was she loud, mean all that needs to be seen so that the reader gets invested. 

Emotions Evoked: 12/15
How good a story is depends on how the reader manages to pull at the reader's emotions. Well you had me then lost me at most. I was going from "awww" to "wait what" then "aish" to "wae" you get the point.

Writing Style: 6/10

Plot + Originality: 8/10
I did like the plot. Though the main storylines have not yet started building up.

General Satisfaction: 8/10
I enjoyed reading though I had to go back to ensure I had the right person in mind. I don't like reading with confusion because it makes me lose interest but that's just my opinion. 

Total Score: 70/100

Review Note: 

I enjoyed reading the book. The plot so far is interesting. I also found the meet cutes interesting as well. However I felt some of the paragraphs were a bit choppy and hard to read. The change in tense a bit distracting. I would find myself trying to correct. This takes away the reader's focus on the story. However this is nothing a little editing can fix. I think I have pointed out most things. Also don't drag out the main storylines you'll lose readers and them a good story. Would reccommend this refreshing read. Happy writing:)