Fighting a New World

10

Ryder's POV

I take one last deep breath as a knock comes banging on the door.

Everyone else had left for work hours ago, and wouldn't be back for another several hours so I had plenty of time.

My heart races a bit as I head to the door.

"Yea ready to go," Patrick asked with a smile when I had opened the door.

"I guess," I say with a shrug as I follow him out of the door before locking it behind me.

"We still don't have to go," Patrick said gently. "She'll understand if you need to take a day to yourself."

"I know she would," I say as I take another deep breath. "But I want to see her." Patrick only smiled again as he led me down to his car.

This had pretty much been our routine for about week or so now. After everyone left for work, Patrick would come by and drive me to see my mom.

I had told Callum that I had been going on walks rather than to see my mom, which he seemed happy about. The only reason I didn't tell him where I was actually going was because I knew he would want to come meet her but I knew it would only make us all feel worse.

She wasn't doing well when I first went to camp but she was well enough to send letters every now and then. And then, some way down the line, the letters just stopped coming.

Patrick kept assuring me that she was fine and that he checked on her often but I knew she wasn't well. It was a lot different when you saw her up close though.

"How are you doing today Ryder," Nancy asked kindly when we walked into my mother's room.

Nancy had apparently been my mom's nurse ever since she got checked in here. She was a surprisingly very nice lady.

"I'm doing pretty good. I think the better question is how is she doing," I said as I came to sit in my usual chair beside her bed while Nancy finished with her vitals.

"She's still doing good. She's still in her coma though but her brain is still active so that's still good news."

"She should have gotten her results last night. Has the cancer spread any more?"

"It hasn't but the treatment isn't working. Her doctors are planning on changing things soon." I only nod as I took her hand in mine.

When I was little she used to sit with me, watching nearly every movie known to man. Her hands were always warm back then but now it was like holding onto an ice cube.

"You feel like waking up today?" I asked after Nancy left the room while Patrick stood silently in the corner.

"Jax let me get some new movies yesterday. We only got to watch one because they all insisted on saving the others so we don't run out of movies. They're weird like that."

"Liam's doing better I think. He found a new friend at work. We haven't got the chance to meet him yet but if Liam likes him, he must be a pretty cool person."

I wait for her to answer but I know she won't. Every now and then her heart will go up by just a few beats before returning back to her resting heart. Since she can apparently still hear me I like to think that when her heart rate goes up, it's because she's talking and it would be rude to interrupt her so I wait until she is done to say anything else.

"Callum got his first pay check a few days ago. Jax didn't want me to but I bought purple pans with his money. Jax and Liam should be getting their first checks in a few days so that will be nice. I think Jax said we are going to get some plates and silverware with some of his check while Liam's will go straight to savings so we can pay rent next month with his. Or it could be the other way around. I don't really listen when he talks about budgeting; it only confuses me more."

Her heart rate goes up higher than before. I assume she's making a joke about my math skills.

For a while I just watch her.

She looks so peaceful. Like she's just asleep, not trapped in a coma as her body slowly shuts down.