when they became villains [draco malfoy] {book 2}

Year 6 - 162

June 29th. It was night and so so close to being the morning of the 30th. Both Astrid and Draco knew there was a big day a head of them and yet neither moved from where they were sat on the couch of the Room of Requirement. It had been so for a good half an hour - occasional small talk or exchanged glances, but mostly it was spent just staring off into the distance or at the cabinet they had just earlier that day tried out on Draco and successfully sent him to and fro the shop of Borgin and Burke's. The boy had come out with a comment of criticism about how much he despised the smell of the shop, but that had not stopped the reality from settling over either of the two.

The following was the last day so it would've needed to be done anyway, but now that they knew they would actually be able to get fellow deatheaters into the school, it wasn't many pleasant ideas that they could think of. The reality was daunting. So for the longest time neither had really known what to say, or even felt the need to say anything for that matter.

It wasn't much later that Astrid gave up on her attempts to get up and go back to bed, or to find appropriate words with which to explain that upon her leaving him, still the boy meant to her much more than she'd like to admit. She gave up and just suggested they spend the night right there on the couch - await the horrid day they would finally get to commit murder together.

Even if Astrid felt disappointed she hadn't managed to carry out the assassination earlier (the girl hadn't even tried the silver spoon, too scared to screw up her chances completely or even worse, attract the Lord to visit her mind again), she couldn't deny she felt a little relieved she wouldn't have to do it alone.

Malfoy agreed without hesitation. Astrid even managed a chuckled when she saw the boy drop onto the couch instantaneously and open his arms. It took no hesitation of her own until she had slipped to lay down right beside him. 

Her back towards him, she snuggled her head into the space right underneath his chin. It wasn't just his touch that warmed her when he placed his hand over her waist and pulled her closer, searching comfort in her just as much as she was searching for comfort in him. Just the same as it had for a long time, it wasn't just the butterflies that twisted and knotted her stomach anymore, whenever she saw him. The guilt of not telling him was eating her way.

Astrid had been facing the cabinet with nothing blocking her view. Her eyes didn't close for she didn't feel sleepy at all, and the girl suspected sleep wouldn't at all come easy to her that night. Nothing ever came easy in life... none of the good stuff at least. Maybe that's what made those good things so special. Like the relationship she had finally developed with Malfoy.

The girl turned around with a frustrated sigh and when she looked up, he was already looking down on her. His face was riddled with an odd pinch of concentration and subconsciously Astrid pulled out her hand to hold it against his cheek. With the soft brushes of her thumb, she brushed the frown away, easing the expression into one of those half-smiles he had. Just one of the corners of the boy's lips was turned up, yet it wasn't a smirk. An odd expression... but she loved it.

Suddenly his eyes closed a little, his top lid sliding over his eye. With her heartbeat speeding up in her chest, she realised he had looked down at her lips. He looked back at her and Astrid could see the question in his stormy grey eyes - ones that twinkled in the firelight with something that looked much like anticipation. She knew what he wanted to do and the gentle squeeze of his hand on her waist only confirmed it.

Astrid could do nothing but blink. All and everything in her had frozen over, except for the rapid beating of her heart, that felt so loud she was almost sure he could hear it.

When she looked down at his lips herself, those same lips whose touch she had not felt for almost exactly a year now, she knew she wanted to. But she also knew she couldn't. Astrid Ninomae could not promise the boy something she would not be able to carry out.