Never Surrender [ Snape x Lupin ]

Chapter Twenty Five

The serenity only lasted while Remus and Severus had each other in sight, once finally accommodated in his new bedroom and past the first few nights catching up with Sirius with sincere joy, Remus finally started to cool down from all the external turmoil. Maybe he had - at last - assimilated that he wasn't in danger there, Severus certainly made a good job scaring him about how much they wouldn't have mercy. Not that Remus needed a reminder, the empty chairs Lily and James left behind spoke for themselves. But now he was undoubtedly starting to give in the sorrow.

The days passed slowly and Remus caught himself wondering if Snape was also thinking of him. There was still some hope left on his heart, that one day he'd wake up and receive a letter from his ex-lover telling him that they should be together again, that he wanted him back. Even Sirius, who was unaware of their romance, noticed Remus took his time to unpack his things, almost as if he was waiting for something to finally complete a task he'd normally perform on the same day of his arrival.

On the day Remus found himself to be strong enough to finish his last suitcase, he was about to organize a pile of books and boxed items when he felt a heaviness in his chest. He knew this box was still to be taken care of, he knew this moment would come. And yet, tears instantly started to roll down his cheeks at the sight of the discrete black box where his collar was.

"It is yours to give" He remembered Severus saying those words to him. Snape was trying to act composed but deep down they both knew the idea of Remus being collared by someone else was crushing

Remus opened the box carefully, later caressing the edges of his leather collar. Just the memory of their last full moon made Lupin sob like a little cub.

At first, Sirius was indeed being casually mean whenever mentioning Snape in their conversations, but after so many nights wandering around the house and catching muffled crying sounds from Remus' bedroom, he started to understand maybe Severus wasn't simply acting out of courtesy by offering his house to Remus. There was something in the way Remus flinched and went silent every time Severus was the subject that made Black finally understand there was something Remus wasn't telling him.

Sirius suspected they were involved from the time he was sneaking into Hogwarts. Whenever he searched for Remus, it was difficult to find a moment where Snape wasn't there or in his way to be. The idea was too disgusting to him, so he never asked about it, he tried not to care to a certain extent, he needed Lupin's help and trust back. And now that he had it, Sirius was making up his mind about starting to make questions. They were best friends after all, and Lupin was certainly getting worse as the next full moon approached, maybe being more open would help him feel better.

It was not like Black to think too much before saying things in conversation, but for this particular subject, he wanted to have some things minimally rehearsed. He believed himself to be completely incapable of being ok with anyone, yet again his best friend, being with Snape. He knew he'd fail in that aspect, so he didn't bother thinking about how to cover it up. What he really wanted was to make sure Remus didn't think his disgust was due to the fact Severus was a man. Remus had always been pretty secretive about his preferences, had been like this since school. James and Peter never noticed, but to Sirius, it was actually strange that a sweet handsome young wizard like their Remus never had a boyfriend. He'd go out and even eventually date girls, but whenever he was looking around, wasn't at them who his eyes landed first.

Sirius even remembers a particular conversation they had in six-year right before they went to the common hall. Remus notified him that he'd be sitting at the Hufflepuff table with this girl, and future girlfriend, named Dilys.

"I'll have dinner with her and her friends but I'll make up to you guys tomorrow after we're done studying," Remus said as they walked

"She seems pretty nice, but Rem... aren't you... searching for, you know... something else?" Sirius tried to ask