The Gift of the Lethe

Repairing in the Light

Apollo hands Pallas a mug, lifting his own to his lips and sipping from it. Pallas looks down into her own, watching the faintly glowing liquid as it swirls. The colors shift from one to another, melting and separating. Pallas takes a sip, rolling the liquid in her mouth. She swallows and takes another, still staring into the mug. When she feels Apollo's eyes on her, she becomes more resolute, sinking in her seat.

But he doesn't listen to her silent request to avoid talking. "Are you going to talk about what happened earlier?"

Pallas raises her gaze to Apollo's golden one. "Do I have to?"

"You do. But if it would help-" He waves his hand and in a beam of sunlight that slices through the darkness of twilight, a loom appears. "I asked Athena to let us borrow this. I had noticed it was a good technique for working through things, so I thought it would help you talk."

Pallas stares at the loom, reaching out to touch it. "If I use the loom, I'm not sure if I'll even be aware of anything else."

Apollo gives her a warm smile. "We can work around it. Why don't you get started."

Pallas perches on the stool in front of the loom, tucking the basket of supplies close to her leg. Then she lifts her hands to the loom and begins to weave, threading the colors over and under each other. The rhythm tries to swallow her, but she is acutely aware of Apollo's gaze. He makes a humming noise, pulling her mind away from the rhythm.

"You're working quickly."

Pallas nods. "Thene's doing, I think."

"What are you making?"

Pallas frowns at the tiny sliver of the tapestry that has come into being since she started. It's split halfway down the middle, one side dark, the other bathed in silvery light.

"I'm not entirely sure, but I think- I think it's the moment when the flashback was fading, and I could see the world again."

Apollo frowns. "You don't know what you're weaving while you're doing it?"

Pallas shakes her head. "Not really. Thene says that its more about channeling the emotions, the pain into something constructive. The motions are soothing, and I can weave without thinking about what I'm weaving."

Apollo nods, flicking his fingers to create a small light that hovers above Pallas' shoulders and illuminate her work. "So if you don't consciously choose what you weave, then how do you know what this is? There's so little of it woven as of yet."

A soft smile blooms on Pallas' face. "You're right, there is very little woven yet. But the duality here, the light and dark. I can't think of anything else it would be."

"Tell me about it."

Pallas frowns, pausing in her movements to touch the point in the fabric where it divides. "When- when I had the flashback, and Artemis was helping me come back to myself, there was a point where I was in two places at once. Here, in the world, and also stuck in- in my memories. This dark part of the tapestry, I think that is my memories. The light is the real world."

"So this is how you viewed it?"

Pallas quickly shakes her head, her hand tightening around the shuttle. "Not exactly. This is a more . . . artistic rendering, I guess? To demonstrate the contrast better."

Apollo nods. "That would make sense. Tell me, what triggered the flashback?"

Pallas grimaces, glancing back at him. "Didn't you see it, from your place in the sky?"

"Perhaps I did. But humor me. Talking about it will help."

Pallas sighs. "I was sparring, with Thalia. First with swords, and then staffs. When we were using the staffs, she kept going at- at my-"

"Take your time. Breathe."

Pallas inhales, closing her eyes for a moment before she exhales and takes another breath. "She kept aiming for my side, and that's where I- where I-" She stops and takes another breath, focusing on the feeling of the weaving. "My side is where I was stabbed."

"So it's a sore spot, then."

Pallas dips her head. "Yes, it is."

"Do you think its the combination of the two that triggers your flashbacks, or only a part of the combination?"

"Hmm."

Pallas pauses, staring at the tapestry. She's done enough of it that she can see the faces of both Artemis and Athena now. Artemis is glowing with a soothing silver light that bathes her surroundings, and Athena's face is full of alarm and realization at what is occurring.

"I think that it is in part of aiming for the side, but it is also the weapon that is used. It would be worse with spears, but I think the staffs resemble a spear enough that it keeps me on edge."

"Ah. Here's what I think you should do. Perhaps next time you spar, you make your side off limits. Or perhaps you work on making weapons with your powers, because that difference may also help you. Try it next time."

"Okay."

Apollo smiles, the expression flickering for a moment just before his eyes widen. "Oh, and before I forget. There is one demigod who has a similar situation to yours."

"You mean the trauma?"

"No, I mean dying and coming back to life. Her name is Hazel Levesque, and she is a daughter of Pluto. She's at Camp Jupiter. Why don't you take a day to go and visit your brother and talk to her. Perhaps the day after tomorrow. I'll let my sister know."

Pallas blinks. There's someone else like her? Someone else who has been reincarnated? "Oh. Thank you."

"You don't need to thank me, Pallas. Now, I think it's time you head off to bed. I'm sure you'll be training heavily tomorrow and exhaustion won't be pleasant."

Pallas laughs. "No, it won't. But- I think I want to finish this first."

Apollo shakes his head. "That'll keep you here for at least another hour. Go sleep. You can work on it tomorrow night."

"Fine." She grumbles beneath her breath, "Pushy."

"Pushy I may be, but at least I'm keeping you healthy. Now go."

Pallas waves him off but listens, leaving the god and the loom behind in the trees to walk back towards the camp.

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Who's excited for Pallas' convo with Hazel? Do you think it'll go well? What do you think will happen next? Tell me your thoughts!

Happy reading and I'll see you next chapter!

~ Goddess of Fate, signing out