Chapter 19: Memories and words

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Authors note: Hey! Sorry for my absence I actually had the best night of my life a.k.a 'Attended Ed Sheeran's concert" haha! He is amazing, dont you agree? Anyways here is chapter 19. Please dont hesitate to tell me what you think of it! It's short, I apologize but I'll make up for it! Comments, suggestions and votes are greatly appreciated. :)

Again, Thank you!!

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THRANDUIL

I knew he was following me. I turn my head slightly to see the faintest outline of Falasdir. I could feel his eyes on me, the tension from them evident. For a moment, I ignore him, trying to calm myself and understand what had just happened.

Mantheniels face flashes in my mind. The look of fear, sadness and surprised mixed as soon as she caught sight of my scar. I felt a slight pang in my heart; brushing it and thoughts of Mantheniel out of my mind, I turn to face Falasdir.

"I did not ask you to follow me." I say my voice surprisingly low. I realized I was tired.

"I know." He says, with a hint of a smile on his face. He breathes in and exhales loudly.

"Tell me, what is your goal exactly? Do you want her to hate you?"

I stay quiet, unable to give out a definite response.

"Because you are doing a pretty good job." He continues, eyeing me curiously. I turn away, hiding whatever emotion I had failed to control showing on my face.

We have stopped walking, standing across each other with only the light of the moon and the sound of a river nearby.

"You care for her." This time it was my turn to watch him hide his emotions from me. Somehow, it did not make me feel any better.

"It would be wrong for me to deny that." He starts making me look at him; his lips were curved up slightly. His eyes filled with something even I could not comprehend. He lets out a sigh, a tired one before his eyes get serious again.

"Do you even know of her past?" He asks me making me raise a brow at him. He chuckles lightly, moving to his left his sword glinting under the moonlight.

"You should not judge her so quickly. She is like you in so many ways." He says, although I could get a hint of sadness from his comment. Falasdir was like family to me, the only one who survived the ambush that day. He probably blames himself as much as me.

I calm down, softening at the ellon before me.

"Why are you doing this?" I ask, he looks at me a moment before focusing his gaze on the moon.

"Doing what?"

I continue to look at him knowing full well he knew what I meant. I shake my head.

"You should not hold back what you feel. It is not advisable." I say, he looks at me a moment before he shrugs his shoulders making confusion bubble in my mind.

"I am not the one who is holding back." He replies, a crooked smile on his face. I watch him with my eyes, unpredictable as he was.

"Did you see her face when she witnessed the flames?"

I stay silent.

"She was rooted to the ground, Thranduil. As if she was afraid."

Silence descends upon us again before he finally excuses himself, bowing to me and leaving me alone with my thoughts and his words that were now echoing in my head.

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I retreat immediately to my chambers when I get back to the palace. Taking off my robe and sitting on my chair, I contemplate about what to do. My eyes fall on to the familiar parchment paper laid on the table, its edges evidently opened. I take it from the table unrolling it in my hand, rereading the words my son had written for me. I stare at it for a moment before the memory of that day came into mind. The first time I had met Mantheniel and found myself unable to stop remembering. What was it about her?

'Jealousy is an unflattering trait for a king.' The worlds of Elrond echo in my mind. Had I been jealous? There was something about 'everything' that happened at dinner that makes me think Elrond knew something. Yes, maybe it was somewhat irritating how she treated people better than she treats me. I am king for Valars sake! On top of it all, she completely played me in my own game. Why did I even ask for her?

Nevertheless, at the forest, the moment I had scolded her. The moment plays in my head, the image of her sprawled on the ground because of a dress I had made her wear. The orc, the blade. I had felt... fear at the sight of her. What angered me was the fact she had not tried to fight back. She merely closed her eyes. What in middle earth was wrong with her? If I had not come in time, would she still be alive?

I force the thoughts away; it was starting to be unbecoming of me. She was aggravatingly stubborn with a temper worse than mine was but sometimes a little confusing. I let out a sigh sinking lower on my chair. I had never had these problems in my kingdom before. No one has ever given me much to think and worry about. Worry. The only person I had ever worried about was Legolas and now... My irritation grew, confused as to what was thrown at me.

She had not snapped back.

I let out a frustrated sigh as my mind wanders to her again. Her and her recklessness. However, at that moment, I had expected her to scream back, try to hit me. Anything at all but... I let out a soft chuckle as my hand reaches for my left cheek. Right. She had seen it. I try to stop, letting my mind wander on other things and other problems such as the spider infestation in my realm and stubbornly, my mind travels again on the day she had saved my son. The day she wore a dress. These thoughts never fail to annoy me.

'I am not the one who is holding back.' Falasdirs words confused me, was he implying that someone else had an interest on Mantheniel? Or was he referring to Mantheniel herself. Either way, both thoughts proved to be unfavorable to me.

She was afraid.

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