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Hi loves we're back tracking a little at the beginning of this one. Happy reading..

38

Lottie's POV.

I just watched.

Utterly helpless as Rowan spiralled.

I haven't seen him like this- I don't know if this is normal-

Okay obviously this isn't normal, but for Roe, I don't know if this is normal.

He was marching back up to the door. Frustration literally rolling of him, so much so the energy seemed almost visible in the air.

I reached for the door handle when he didn't stop, when his tension built up into his chest and then into his arm...and I watch utterly fucking shocked when he punched the house. Like he slammed his fist down against the wall and my eyes bulged.

I didn't think he had an aggressive bone in his body.

Ok no.

Enough now right? I have to do something.

I get out the car, jogging towards him as he rested his head against his front door and then he took a deep breath, looked down at his hand, nodded and turned around.

I met him half way back to the car and my eyes are on his bloody hand.

"The hell Rowan?" I gasp. "What were you thinking, you-"

You have hurt yourself.

He doesn't say anything and out of instinct I reach up to press my hands against his cheeks, I want to hold him, to try and make it ok somehow.

But my language with my hands is not one he understands.

Or ok, understands is the wrong word. He just doesn't want it. He pulls away from me, looking at me panicked as if I was the one to attack him with this.

I wrap my arms around myself. "I am sorry."

He shakes his head at me.

But the pure panic in his eyes lingers, I don't think it's from me trying to hold him.

It's just there.

Bubbling in him.

I don't know what to do.

He was ok.

We lied on the floor.

He then acted ok.

I usually can tell.

"Get in the car." Rowan commands. Sort of. His voice is harsh, angry and it immediately makes me defensive. Out of habit. But as he walks back around to his side I know that tone was nothing to do with me.

I swallow, Lottie help. Don't get butt hurt by a tone.

I nodded, I am bigger than that now. So I get back in the car beside him and I just stare, I do, I watch him because I am about to call someone.

Anyone.

Sutton wants us to go to his. Like he said about doing work all four of us, making dinner. Fran messaged back when I asked if he was sure it would be ok with her. She said it was more than ok.

So I was going to tell Rowan that.

But he mutters a curse to himself and with his hand that must have been in so much pain, he just gets out the car again and I scramble out too, following him.

He walks up to the door, checks the lock again.

I am worried he's going to break it.

The lock.

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