The beeping of the hospital mixed with the unpleasant spell of hand sanitiser became the new norm for the couple. Their date plans several days back had expired in their head and all they cared about was making sure Mireu woke up. They were told the chances were slim and they wouldn't be surprised if pulling the plug was necessary. That day, Renjun had shed many tears whilst Xinyi had barely even let one escape. Though, they lay in eachother arms until dawn, finding that inch of safety in eachother.
The doctors couldn't locate what was the issue, as expected. So there were simply nothing they could do to help the poor boy. Giving the boy wrong medication and treatment was a death sentence in itself.
It was the day of mother's day, and all Xinyi could feel was the panic of a mother staring at a dying child.
"Xinyi" Renjun stammered. Renjun's tone had dropped several times and was filled with such melancholy and pain; It didn't sound like Renjun at all.
"Mireu's mother's day gift" Renjun passed the girl a plant. The plant was small, but blossoming with a healthy green. She took the pot, the rough porcelain scratching against her skin. Until she read the label stuck on the pot, that she completely broke.
Thank you for helping me grow
- Huang Mireu
Holding it close to her, she couldn't contain the emotions that flooded up and spilled out in whimpers. She hadnt cried like this in years. Perhaps the last time she did was the first time she heard her parents fight.
Renjun sat next to her, and pulled her towards him. He felt her body trembling and her voice coming out in muffled cries. Grief, pain, remorse, climbing towards her throat and creating billions of knots in her stomach. Renjun could not believe he was the stronger one right now as he held her entangled with his body. He had finally known what she felt like when she held him. He felt like all he wanted to do was wipe the tears off her face and tell her everything was going to be OK, even if it wasn't.
The little boy on the bed had so many wires attached to him, like he was a mere puppet strung to the needles of life. Being thrown around and abused but yet, he still had to smile to make everyone else smile. The beating of the monitor made the background music of the performance the little puppet danced in, and the bed he lay on was the same stage he was going to end his performance on.
The doctors came in with a clipboard in hand a sullen frown on their face. They knew what that meant. There was no hope.
"It's time to pull the plug" One of the man dressed in the big white cloaks said. Xinyi looked at him. He looked like an Angel ready to receive Mireu in open arms.
"Pull it" Xinyi whispered.
She heard it. The long beep.
"Time of death, 12:01 am Friday"
—
Death can really change how you look at the world. From a useless boy picked up from the streets to a little boy full of sunshine to play and care for her when she could not herself. She played the scene over and over again. How the oceans of imagination and long stretching rivers of dreams just disappeared in Mireu's eyes. Grief is the price we pay when we take the moments that we thought we would have thousands more of for granted.
She had never realised just how much a little boy could mean to her, until he was gone. Grief had done enough to Xinyi, a cold hearted apathetic monster. It had stripped her of all her armour to show her naked with the shards of glass and broken pieces of her tattooed on her skin. Sorrow had forced the memories to slip out and roll down her cheek.
In the empty hospital room with the window as the only light, Renjun and Xinyi sat in silence staring at a corpse of a 9 year old boy. He was so young, so free. Full of smiles and laughter. He was the bravest little boy they've ever met.
Renjun rose from the chair, reaching over to the beside cabinet ready to pack away his things when a note scraped his finger. Tentatively sliding it into his grip, he unfolded it.
Hi dad,
My name is Gang Yeongho. I'm 7 years old.
I'm sorry that I didn't tell you earlier. When we first met, I was a bit scared. So I was quiet. Then you gave me the name Huang Mireu. I liked it. I liked it a lot. I didn't like the name Gang Yeongho anymore. Yeongho was the person who tricked children and killed good guys. Huang Mireu was the powerful dragon who burned people like Yeongho away.
I really liked mum when I first saw her. She was pretty, and she was brave. She was much cooler than superman. I even saw her sword last time! I bet mum has slain many bad people with that sword. I wanted to grow up to be like her—brave, strong, fearless, courageous. When I watched TV, I saw superman and ironman. But I don't think any of them can compare to mum. She was much cooler than all of them. I hope mum will always be a brave, strong, fearless superman.
By the time you're reading this, I might not be here anymore. I know you and mum love each other very much. I hope you and mum will always love each other. So I want to make a wish, dad. I wish you will take the rest of my soul and become human to live with mum. She would be so happy. She doesn't smile that much.
That's my one and only wish.
For you and mum to be happy.
From: Your son, Huang Mireu.
Renjun dropped the piece of paper. He wasn't going to do it. Renjun couldn't let himself. But one glance at Mireu's face, and he could almost hear the little boy putting his hands together and wishing for him to grant his final wish.
Xinyi picked up the paper, and read every single on of the words.
"Renjun" She was so close to breaking all over again "He wasn't 9, or 10. He was 7. A 7 year old boy who knew he was going to die and wrote a letter begging us to take him and his soul for our happiness" She dropped her head in her hands "He was only 7"
Renjun glanced at her with tears in the corners of his eyes. His gaze was glassy and broken, and so was everything inside of him. Xinyi stood up and walked to his side. Her arms wrapped around his waist and her head leant against his shoulder as Renjun slipped his finger to clasp around Mireu's chubby hands. They were so cold.
"He would want you to do it" Xinyi closed her eyes
"I promised to protect you" Renjun leant closer to Mireu's, whispering as tears streamed down endlessly from his face. He tidied the messy strands of black hair that never got cut. His thumb brushed against his pale cheek, pulling the boy up to press him tightly against his chest "I promised that everything was going to be OK"
Xinyi squeezed Renjun's hands.
Renjun closed his eyes and decorated Mireu's tiny finger with a bead of tears
"I'm sorry, for being a father not worthy of your smile"
you know the drill. as always, it isn't a khyuan book without someone dying
YOU ARE READING
a quiet mind | huang renjun
Fanfiction"She's whiskey in a teacup. A rather dangerous elegance I must say. She wears her jewellery as if they were studded with skulls, her perfume a sweet smell of blood. Her lips a bloody red and smile like a loaded gun. You can try destroy her, but all...
