rock 'n love // alex turner

20th

When i arrived to the kitchen, i saw Madison and Caryl watching Mads' mobile phone
"Oh my God" Madison said
"What?" i asked
"Anne you have to see Alex" Madison replied
"Actually i don't think it's a good idea Mads" i said
"No Anne, really come here" Caryl said
So i went next to them and they showed me a photo that Matt posted last night

"Oh shit, what happened to his hair?" i said
He cut his hair and he looks like Danny Zuko from Grease...what the fuck?! But i have to admit that he was really handsome with this hairstyle

"Now he really looks like a Rockstar" Madison said
"Do you still talk with Matt?" i asked her
"Yeah sometimes" she said
"Uh okay, i just wanted to know how Alex was" i said
"Why don't you texted him Anne?" she said
"No Madison, maybe another time" i said and she rolled her eyes.

I get a message from my mum, she told me that she was coming to London so we invited her for dinner

"Here they are my favourite girls!" my mum said
"Fay good to see you!" Madison said
We were talking about our days and other things and then my mum asked:
"What about boys?"

When i heard this, my face changed quickly and Caryl and Madison looked at me
"Well mum, it's not going very well at the moment..." i said
"What are you talking about honey?" she asked curiously and then Madison started to speak
"Well Fay, your daughter is in love with a musician"
"What?! Who is?" she asked
"He's an amazing guy but now they argued and Anne don't want to text him, he also wrote a song about her!" Madison said
"Thank you Mads" i said annoyed

"Oh wait, he is the guy who i saw with you in Canterbury?" my mum asked
"Yes mum..." i replied

I told her what happened that night and Madison made her listened the song
"Anne do you listen to what he said? I think he still want you in his life" she said
"Mum i messed up everything" i said
"Honey it's a normal thing having discussions in a couple" she said "You have to understand if you still want him in your life tho"
Of course i still want him but why nobody understands that i need time!

When my mum left, Madison came to me:
"Anne i have a message from Matt"

Matt:
Actually he's writing a lot, but we noticed that he's sad about that. He was scared to release Mardy Bum because it's clear that it is about their argument. What about Anne? Is she okay? I miss you girls xx

So he really cares about me, i feel more guilty now. I have to find a way to make peace with him, i don't know if we are ready for a relationship but i just want him back in my life even just as friends.

The radio kept playing their songs, even the oldest ones and it was nice hearing his voice, i really miss him. But i know that in two weeks they will be in London...maybe we can go to their concert but i have to find the courage to talk to him. I can do it, right?

"Anne i think it's a beautiful idea" Caryl said
"Yeah but you have to talk to him okay?" Madison said
"I swear i'll try. I just wanna apologise" i said

Everynight I thought about what I could tell him but it all seemed ridiculous, i'm just a coward...as always