Heart at War // JJ Maybank

24

JJ Maybank

          "Talk to me, Lee.." I begged her kneeling in front of her, pushing her wet hair out of her face. She hasn't spoken one word to me in over an hour, I hoped maybe a shower would help in the smallest way possible.

But she sat on the edge of her bed, wrapped in a towel and hair soaking wet staring with a blank face at the wall. "Please, Lee B." I cup her face in my hands, forcing her to stare at me. "I'm worried."

Her face stays motionless, staring at me like I wasn't even in front of her. I brush my thumb against her lip, waiting for any kind of reaction.

"I was just with him yesterday..." There was no emotion in her voice, she spoke so monotone it scared me but at least she was staring back into my eyes like I was here now. Her pupils are dilated, her mouth hung partly opened as she stares at me.

"I was just with him yesterday, JJ." She repeats, and even though it broke my heart... The tears that began to pool in her eyes sent relief through me, relieved that she was showing emotion instead of blankly staring into space.

"I was just... With him." A sob escapes her mouth, as I'm quick to pull her into my arms. Running a hand down her head, repeating the action as she cries into my shoulder. "I... Was just," She hiccups. "With him!"

I let her cry for as long as she needed, it didn't matter that my knees began to burn from squatting down in front of her, or that her wet hair was cold against my neck— Nothing but Lena mattered.

She sniffles, pulling away from me and leaning her forehead against mine. Her eyes closed, lips still quivering as she sucks in a shaky breath. "Why don't you put on some dry clothes... Then I'll lay with you." I offered, soothingly rubbing her knees as she nodded in return.

I stand and as I make my way towards the door to leave her in privacy, I look back noticing she hasn't moved a muscle. I doubted that she would when I left too, so I bit down on my bottom lip before making my way towards her dresser.

I pulled out a pair of sweatpants that I knew she loved to wear at night, she told me they were the comfiest pair that she owned. I searched for a loose-fit shirt, only to find a bunch of tank tops and other tight-fit clothing.

I look back at her, her stare on the floor and her hands in fists on her lap. It caused me pain, the type of pain I never wanted to feel.

I faced her dresser again, taking a few deep breaths to calm myself. I would take the pain from the beatings from my asshole father over and over again, over the pain I felt seeing Lena this way.

I looked down at my tee-shirt before pulling it over my head and making my way back towards Lena, "Can I?" She nods in response.

"Come on, Lee," I whispered, pulling her off the bed and turning her around. Before pulling the towel off of her, I slide the shirt over her head not wanting to make her uncomfortable in any way.

Once the towel-covered her chest, I let the towel fall to the floor and avoided looking anywhere inappropriate. I gently wrapped my hand around her wrist, pulling it through the sleeve, and then repeated the action on her other arm.

I turned her to face me, her eyes blank and slightly glossy as she looked back at me. "Do you... Want to put your pants on? Or do you want me to?" I ask her, pushing hair behind her ear.

"You." Her voice comes out just above a whisper, I press my lips to her forehead and then gently place her back down on the bed.

I spilled on a fresh pair of underwear first, before pulling the sweatpants up her legs. She climbs up her bed, laying over top of the covers and pulling her lays up to her chest. I walk around the side of her bed, turning off the light in the process before climbing in with her.