All Eyes On Us

33 ✘ what to do with peace?

"WHY CAN'T WE ever go to yours?" I mumble to Luca as I watch him work around the kitchen, putting together my favourite dessert. His back is facing me as he takes out the Amalfi lemon cake from the fridge.

"Because, yours is always unoccupied," He answers, placing the cake on the cake stand in front of me.

I go cross-eyed and lick my lips eager to have a taste. Luca laughs at my obvious excitement, before taking his time cutting a slice and putting it on a plate. Once done, he digs a fork into it and offers it to me.

I lean over the counter as he places it in my mouth, and hum around the fork in approval. Luca might not know how to treat a person right, but God can he bake.

It almost forgives his sins. Almost.

"Luca, that's so delicious!" I groan, once swallowing down the bite.

"Really?" He digs the fork back into the cake before bringing it back out and placing the cut-off piece into his mouth.

I swallow, not making a comment on how he's just used the same fork.

"It's alright," he shrugs.

"You're being way too hard on yourself, I love it!" I'm not even exaggerating the taste is out of this world. A mixture of tangy and sweet simultaneously exploded into my mouth the first second he'd fed me the slice.

"That's because you're an easy critique, plus I haven't baked in a while."

"Not even for Cassie?"

The line catches him off guard so much so he pauses. "Always petty, you." I hum in response, with a feline smile. "But, I am sorry," genuine sorrow claims his voice at the apology.

"It isn't alright, but we'll manage. I've dealt with worse." When his brows draw up telling me to elaborate I continue on whilst suffocating the nerves that threaten to eat me inside out. "Well nothing can beat when she threw a smoke bomb into a closet she deliberately locked me into." I hum with amusement now but back in ninth grade she'd traumatised me. "I had a terrible asthma attack after that." I haven't stopped carrying my pump since even though I eventually grew out of it.

"When was this?" All ease drops from his voice, when I meet his eyes I'm surprised to see the anger in them. I thought he knew.

"Are you joking?"

"Do I look like I'm joking?"

"Luca, this was freshman year — Valé had been the one to find me sobbing and choking hours later when she finished her meeting for school gov. I was practically knocked out, I didn't go to school for a month after that. I didn't get out of bed, I was so scared to even step foot outside." No recollection seizes his face, "Yo—You didn't know?"

He didn't know? That doesn't change anything, I remind myself. It can't.

His beautiful face morphs into pure rage. His usual stoic brown eyes swirl with storms as he looks down at me from the other side of the kitchen counter.

"I knew fuck all!" He booms.

"Don't raise your voice at me, Luca," I snap. Why is she angry at me? I'm the one who Cassie traumatised not him. He still dated her after that. He took her to our cabin after that.

"Sorry," he quickly apologises, eyes falling onto the cake in front of us. "But that really happened?" He softly asks.

"I mean, It's not something I'd brag about, but yeah...Luca, why do you think I hate Cassie?"

"Because of shit she said, I didn't know she was crazy enough to induce your asthma."

"Didn't you realise I was gone that month?" Did I mean that little to him that my lack of existence didn't even raise any flags?

"Bailey said you went to Iran for a month."

Bless Bailey and her desire to protect me from new spiralling rumours, I always found it odd when I'd arrived back at school no one had said anything.

Not because I was popular and meant much, but because not even people I labelled as my 'school—friends' showed any concern.

"And you believed I would miss school willingly, jeopardising my perfect attendance?" I used to break into hives at the thought of missing out on Sterling Academy's hundred percent attendance award. It seems all foolish now but the validation used to fuel me when I was younger.

Noticing the deep furrow of his brows, and clenching of jaw I reach over the counter and go to trace over the lines. I drop my hand at the last minute realising how weird it'd be for me to touch him.

"You can't seriously be mad over this," I whisper. Had he been my friend back then I wouldn't even have batted an eye at the things Cassie had said or done. Back then Luca's friendship could've cured anything negative I felt. Of course, I know it isn't true now, but it felt like it.

In the moments of extreme bullying I rarely ever saw Cassie as herself, but rather an extension of Luca and his betrayal.

His frown is deep and oddly reminds me of him when he was younger. "I'm not the one who goes around causing kids to fucking miss school because of something I did."

I raise a brow at that. "Arrow Levisay, Madden Seanor, London Remmington, Fillian Bennet..."

"People who don't deserve it," He clears up.

I nod with a 'sure' look before rolling my eyes. He's a complete and utter liar but his twenty—second claim to fame as the morality police is an interesting scene to watch play out.

I go to open my mouth to object but Luca shuts me up by placing another fork full of cake into it. I gawk at him, but he eyes me with innocence.

"Oops," He shrugs as I swallow down the mouthful.

"I am so telling my mom about this!" I whine all petulant-like.

Luca smiles and his entire face brightens up with it. "Do it, Mariam's always loved me."

I raise an accusatory finger, "I wouldn't be so sure. I'm her daughter."

He wacks my finger away. "You're going to need to get in line for her love."

"You're so full of yourself, Luca." I scoff, but there's a smile that I'm failing to hide.

"Maybe," he shrugs, but there's a smile pulling at his lips.

I return it. "Maybe," I mock.

"You don't even sound a little like me."

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Bonjour Papillons !!

another chapter dedication, an ode to @desii_dior for everything - the comments, the questions, the love - thank you <33

also I'm celebrating surpassing 80k+ words so that's bloody crazy !!