Happy Place || A Jerrie Fanfiction

XXVII - TEMPORARY

It has become sort of a habit for me to be roaming around a certain spot every time I find the need to ruminate on something that puts me in shambles. I don't particularly know the reason why, I just do it without question.

Maybe it puts me at ease, or perhaps it's because I got hit by a pole once when I thought about something too deeply whilst walking on the sidewalk, though I already forgot about what it was now. And because of that, I resorted to walk around in circles instead.

And that's exactly what I am doing right now in front of Perrie's house.

Roughly a minute later after the phone call with Jesy, I still couldn't find the courage within me to simply knock on her door.

Maybe it was cowardice holding me back, or the feeling of not wanting to let someone down. But whatever it was, I have to get rid of it if I want things to end peacefully with Perrie.

"What are you doing here?"

I startled, a gasp escaping my mouth. and spun around to come face to face with Harry in his work clothes. I raised an eyebrow at him and crossed me arms over my chest, wondering why he's here. He cleared his throat and buried his hands in his back pocket as he tipped his head toward the door.

"She's still not here," he simply said. "She'll come back tomorrow, so she told me to come guard the house for tonight."

I blinked, unable to form words for a second, before I responded, "Oh. Where is she?"

A crease formed in-between his brows and he questioned, "She didn't tell you?"

I mirrored his expression. "Tell me what?"

"That it's her —" He closed his mouth and widened his eyes, looking like he almost divulged one of the biggest secrets on the planet, which only fueled my curiosity even more.

"That it's her what?" I prompted, stepping closer.

"Uhm, well — I — okay, hold on," Harry stammered, stumbling back and waving both his hands in front of him and shrugging his shoulders as if I'm interrogating him, which I kind of am, I think. "I don't know if Pez even wanted me to tell you. I think it's best if you just wait till tomorrow . . ."

And so that's what I did.

When I got home last night after that, I called Jesy about it and asked her to inform Derek that I might have to delay my flight (which Jesy commended me for because apparently she's been praying that I don't become a coward who just leaves their flings without any warning).

And then I told Steve to tell him that I might need some time.

"How much more time do you need?" He asked last night when I called him once I reached my room. He sounded exasperated and I don't know if it's because I called at the wrong moment, or if it's me who's the problem here.

"Give me at least tomorrow," I told him, "A week at most."

"I'll give you only tomorrow," He simply grunted and hung up, and I could only rely on the imagination where I'm strangling him to death to put myself to sleep.

I didn't tell him for what reason, though; I didn't tell him that it's because I needed to see Perrie first. I didn't want Perrie to be in the middle of me and him because there's no need to drag her into this potential mess. And even though he already knew that I like her, I didn't want him to think that a woman is holding me back, let alone if it's a woman I'm pretty sure I won't be able to see ever again after I leave this place.

If this thing with Perrie is going to be temporary, I can't immortalize it by talking about her with everyone else. I have to make sure that it stays that way — temporary.