As I have nothing to give you, I give you my heart (IU Verse Book#1)

Chapter 21

          "I know that he has completely and utterly... captured my heart."

          Jihyuk had been pondering over this statement for the past hour. He had been sitting in his office, provided by Jieun, silently thinking about that statement alone. He had been in his agency trying to get some paperwork done, but to no avail, his thoughts always drifted back to Jieun's statement and a half-hour later he found himself sitting in his small office in Edam Entertainment. Jieun was in her own office going over some projects that she was going to take on in the upcoming year (that's what she had told him), so Jihyuk found himself alone in his office, his thoughts drifting back and forth but it always ended up going back to the same thing. 

           He didn't know how to describe the feeling that he got upon hearing that statement. He wasn't sure whether to be happy for her or sad for himself. He didn't deny the fact that he had been thinking about what it would be like if Jieun got her happy ending with someone else, and that someone else will be the one taking care of her from now on, not him. The thought drove him to emptiness and heartbreak, and he does not know why. Is it because of his overprotectiveness over her, or is it because the thought of her spending the rest of her life with someone that was not him broke his heart into a million pieces? He chose to think that it was the former because, well, he doesn't think that he deserved to be with someone like her. 

           He chose to interpret his feeling as overprotectiveness, and not...dare he say it, love. No. He does not really know what love is or how it felt, so that was out of the picture. Was it though? He kept asking himself. But he knows for sure that being with Jieun brought him happiness. Yes. He never knew what happiness really felt like until he met her. So who's to say that what he felt towards her wasn't love?

         He heaved a sigh. Even if what he felt towards her was stronger than overprotectiveness, or even on the brink of love, he knew that she was someone that he couldn't have. She was near but she seemed so far away, far within his reach. He knew that one day he had to let her go and forget about her. Because once she was safe and sound from whatever monster was trying to hurt her, he knew that the time to leave would come. 

          The sound of someone knocking on his door lifted him away from his thoughts. He stood up and went to open the door to find Sangin looking at him expectantly. "Hyung." Jihyuk addressed the older man with surprise. Sangin just grinned at him as Jihyuk invited him in. They settled on the couch. Jihyuk asked the older man if he needed anything to drink, to which he held his hand up and said that he was fine.

           "I just came to see how you were doing and catch up with you. We haven't been able to have a proper reunion ever since I came back." Jihyuk nodded, smiling. "It's been a while, Hyung." 

          "That it is. We haven't seen each other since, what, Sangil first became the director three years ago? Man, that seemed like a really long time." 

          "How was your stay in Daegu? Is your sister okay now?"

           "Yeah, she's fine now. I was pretty shaken up when I first saw her. My heart nearly dropped when I found out what really happened."

          "The perpetrator has been lying low for a while now. It seems like they are taking their time calculating their next move. I'm afraid the next attack would be far more severe and reckless than the previous ones." Jihyuk confessed. Sangin nodded solemnly. 

          "I'm really worried about Jieun. I kept thinking about her safety back in Daegu, but I know you were by her side so that lessened my worry a bit." He paused. "I heard you took quite a toll from the first attack. You were hospitalized for three days."