If you love me, don't let me go (Brendon Urie Fanfiction)

Chapter Twenty One

One week later

    I was a Friday morning and I was up early already making pancakes. I took today off, so I don't have to go to work. I put my hair up and turned on the radio so I could pass my time with cooking. I was washing my hands when a lady on the radio started talking.

   "Okay now this next song is called This is Gospel by the amazing band called Panic! At the disco! Now, this song has meaning, but no one knows what it is. A girl? A problem? Who knows! Listen now to find out and after the song we'll be talking to Brendon Urie!"

   Well I have to hear this, I thought as I turned up the radio.

   I was just putting on the pancakes when the song went off and then the lady started speaking again.

    "Hello again everyone. That song you just heard was called This is Gospel by Panic! Right now, we have Brendon Urie to talk to! So let's get started. So Brendon, how has everything been?"

   "Fine so far. Just getting ready for the concert Sunday," he said.

  His voice sounded just like before. Amazing with a little bit of a lower tone.

    "Yes and isn't it the This is Gospel tour?"

    "Yes it is," he said with a light laugh.

    His laugh sounded the same. It was addicting and contagious.

   "So what is the song about? Or can you spill a little bit about it?" The reporter said.

   "Well. This one person inspired me to write it. I guess that after I wrote it, I felt free. Like that I wasn't being held back anymore," he said.

   Once I heard his response, I dropped everything. He doesn't care anymore. He doesn't need me. I felt like my heart just dropped down to my stomach. It hurts to hear him say that.

   "Is it about a girl?" She said.

   "Well, kinda. The words are what the girl said but I wrote it about Spencer. She helped with the words. It kinda has two meanings. One for Spencer and the other for my personal life," he said.

   "Okay, so did this girl have a effect on you or you life?"

   "A big effect. You know, I still think about her. Actually miss her, but it's like the saying, i'f you love something let it go and if it comes back it's meant to be'," he said.

   In the background you could hear someone say "are you okay?" I heard him sniff. Was he crying for me? Was the pain just too much? He was quoting me. He does care, because if he didn't, he wouldn't have said all of this.

    "I'm sorry for the choking up," he said.

   "No, it's fine. Do you think you'll ever see her again?" She asked.

   "I really hope, but then again, I don't know what I would do. Of course I would want to run up to her and hold her, but you can't just do that. Actually, I don't think we'll ever see each other, but it's nice to dream, right?" He said.

    I wanted to scream I was so mad. I wanted him to see me right now. Just to show him how much I care. I don't know anymore. I wanted to just sit down and wait. Wait until I see him to show him how scared and mad I was when he wasn't there. I needed him through a lot of times.

   "Okay, well that's all! Panic! At the disco's next concert it this Sunday. Hope to see you there!" She said and with a click of a button, I was sitting in the silence. All alone.

   A couple of minutes later, I wanted to do something. Call someone or anything. So I got out my phone and dialed the first number that came to mind.

   "Hello?" He said.

   "Hey Cole! It's Alex, I wanted to know if you were free tomorrow?" I said.

   "I was going to go to the little coffee shop down by my apartment. You want to come?"

   "Sure. Sounds great." I said.

    "Okay, I'll see you at 8 AM. Oh and I'll text you the address."

   "Okay, bye!"

   "Bye, Alexandra," he said.

   No one has ever called me by my full name. He was the only one who actually knew it. It was sweet that he still remembered.