Love, Romance And A Boy (bxb) - Completed

ten

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Oh god, Scott.

We'd kissed. Twice already. Scott and I had full on made out in that bathroom. I really wanted to pretend I didn't like it. But my impulses drove me crazy.

I regretted it with every fiber of my being. I regretted it because he was Scott. Fucking Scott. I hated the dude, and three made-out sessions wasn't going to change that. Nothing was going to change that.

But mostly, I regretted it because of Jessica. She was my damn sister for crying out loud! Add to the fact that I keep making out with her boyfriend.

These thoughts haunted me as I walked through the woods, careful not to slip, or to sprain my ankle. We kept our pace, never stopping once.

Damnit, I wish I could say it wasn't consensual, and that he forced himself onto me. That would be such a great escape route.

I sighed as I looked up. The sun almost set in the horizon. It created this pink, purple color to scatter across the skyline, and I inhaled sharply. It was so breathtaking.

I'd kissed him back with the same passion, the same desire. As much as I hated to admit this, I liked it. And I liked it more than I should've.

Still feeling the tingling on my lips, I brought my hand up to touch my lips. I wanted to do it again. I wanted to sin again.

And that was what was really tearing me apart. Everything would be so much simpler if I could just say that, looking back on it, I was disgusted. Revolted, even. But if I wanted to do it again, did I even really regret it?

I shook my head, clearing all those unfiltered thoughts. I had to come up with a plan. If I could lie to him, and make it sound like I didn't like it...

Anything to get my feet out of the mud.

Scott stopped in strides, turned around to look at me. He opened his mouth to say something, but nothing came out. I could tell he wanted to confess something.

"Can you tell how you feel?" he asked, his voice delicate and soft like he didn't want to hurt me. "Please," he added desperately. "Because I never know how you feel."

"Yeah, you do," I disagreed, folding my arms over my chest. "You know that I don't like you, so I don't know what more you want me to tell you. I really don't."

I hated saying these things to him. It was so foreign on my tongue. He walked toward me, killing all the distance between us. I had to look up a little to meet his eyes.

He stood so close to me, I could feel his breath fanning my mouth. "Well, in that case..." he trailed off as he leaned down to kiss me. And I was going to let him.

Just as out lips brushed together, the image of my sister appeared in my head, and I pulled away. I couldn't...

"No," I said shakily. "We shouldn't."

Surprise was evident on Scott's face. "What?" he asked, running a hand through his hair.

"No," I repeated, more firmly this time. "This can't happen. It won't. I have to protect my sister. How can you not want to protect your own girlfriend?"