inner child

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being a mother is telling your child everything will be okay, when in your heart you know everything is the furthest from okay and you don't know how you're going to fix it, it's letting your child lay their head in your lap as you run your fingers through their hair, watching them drift into peaceful sleep, where they look so innocent and lost in the purity of dreams—where no outside influences can hurt them. i never wanted to be a mother, and i still don't want to be a mother, but here i am,mothering a child who's already grown up but starved of their youth, a child who's seventeen now, but who houses lost children ages twelve through fifteen, and one day i hope to stop mothering my child, i hope the innocence they lost can be replaced with happiness, but today i'm a mother, and tomorrow i'm a mother, and i will be her mother until she needs me no longer.

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