fire trucks don't stop at red lights, but they have people to save,
you don't stop at red lights, but
you take "no" to mean "yes"
you took crying to mean "please".
my heart drops at yellow lights,
fear surrounds me in those critical seconds between green and red,
go and stop,
freedom and this nightmare i'm stuck in.
my steering collects nail marks as i grip in fear, hoping for the red light to be red.
the police don't stop at red lights, lights brazenly flashing as the pretend to be useful,
they didn't care when you ran a yellow, it was just short of a crime and i had no proof.
but even when you ran a red, hitting me in the process no one cared.
the police certainly didn't,
the photographic evidence "wasn't convincing enough".
you consider yellow lights green;
you never slow, pausing to ask yourself if it's the right thing to do.
as if holding a child to the floor is ever the right thing to do.
as if forcing yourself on her is ever the right thing to do.
you never understood the word "no",
it was never in your vocabulary.
you treated me as your gear shift
forcing me in different directions for your use,
you coward.
you knew i said no but you couldn't accept it,
couldn't accept that you'll never be with someone unless you forced her.
even though i wasn't driving, i got the ticket, the fine. reckless driving.
i paid in months of panic attacks, years of nightmares, and a sinking feeling every time i'm near a boy, all because your wouldn't slow down at my yellow light.
YOU ARE READING
the night the stars fell - poetry collection
PoetryPLEASE READ THE CONTENT WARNINGS this poetry collection includes themes and descriptions of: sexual violence/assault/harassment PTSD hallucinations depression anxiety self harm disordered eating in my experience feeling seen through works of writ...
