When all dreams crumble

11. A promise to came back

Jana

February 1916

I haven't heard anything from Matei since his last letter for me. And I got his last letter six months ago. I don't know if he is even alive anymore and if he is then in which condition?! Two month ago was said at the radio that they have lost so many soldiers, and their powers are kinda quit. But they have not given anything new announcements or information for us. Although there has not been new bombings or anything since whatever...that doesn't mean that here would be good to live at here. All is just a one big mess. I am not sure if I will survive from this all. Have been crying the past two hours straight. 

Can I ask one, just one thing.... Why is this world so unfair nowadays? Why did they took our normal life although we did not do anything wrong??? They did took everything from us; family, friends, homes... and what do we get back from this. If we do have a bad luck we can't never see our relatives, daddies and boyfriends. It is the sad truth.

I remember that we had planned our future before the war order were given. Back then we were still young and naiive. We had so much to do. I remember when we tough that when we are couple year older we are able to get married. We thought that we could get some children but now it is difficult to think about those things when we don't even know that how long we stay alive.

I am not wishing anything more that Matei could possibility to came back to home... I miss him so much. I have been living here at Glasgow now almost one whole year (11 months)... My new 'family' is actually quite nice. At the beginning I did have problems with their daughter Josephine, because we are from whole different world. She is super rich and I don't have so much money. But now we literally are the best friends. Her family is originally from a little country named Forks. They used to life at the estate when I was living at the small house. 

When I do know that this large house is not a miracle. This is kinda like a castle. But this house is closely guarded for 24/7. At now Jose and me are close friends  and I got to know that also his boyfriend needed to leave just couple months ago. He did leave to another base than Matei... So now we do have some common to speak with.

I have been asked from my new parents that if I could be an nurse at American red cross... but even if me and Jose are both eighteen years old ones. unfair...