✅ My Cousin's Keeper [NaNoWriMo 2021]

57. My Disappointment

Tess looked as cute as ever when she arrived back home. She was smiling, which was probably a good thing. I didn't get a chance to interrogate her, because I was quickly trying to turn over an omelette that had stuck to the frying pan and was about to burn. And she didn't stop to talk in the kitchen either, which was unusual for her, but ran straight upstairs and I heard the bathroom door slam.

"Good to see you, too," I muttered. She had said hi on the way past, but hadn't paused even for a single step. My best guess about the reason was that she'd realised how utterly desperate she was, and nothing could come between her and the bathroom. That must mean that the little pervert had kept his hands to himself for once; or Tess's trigger wouldn't let me set conditions like that. Once there was no longer a chance of her needing to have an accident, she could easily have realised how badly she needed to go. But whether the boy had behaved, or the suggestion simply didn't work like that, would be much harder to figure out. I couldn't rest easy yet. But I had a plan that I was sure could tell me what I needed to know.

"Guess she's in a hurry," Ffrances answered me. "Don't be mad with her. She's had a long day, and it could have been pretty stressful."

"Why? Did that little punk–"

"She didn't say anything about Spike," she cut me off, and I knew she wouldn't want me to raise that particular subject again until I digested what she had to tell me. "She's had some drama with another girl at school. Queen bitch cheerleader type, I gather. Been harassing some of Tess's friends. She was trying to be vague, not to go into any personal stuff, but I gather this girl's been picking on gay kids. Well, Tess has a way with words. What I think the kids would call a sick burn, and queen bee ran off with her tail between her legs. But now she's feeling guilty about it."

"I wish she could talk to me about things like that. Adults should be able to deal with bullying, it shouldn't be down to the littlest one to sort things out by herself."

"But they're not really that little," she reminded me. "And Tess is happier being able to deal with things on her own. She might end up needing some emotional support afterwards, but the impression I got was that she's happy about being able to stand up for herself."

I couldn't really argue with that. I didn't want Tess to be standing up for herself, because that could only bring her closer to deciding she didn't want to be babied anymore. But I knew that as soon as I mentioned making her a permanent baby, I would no longer have Ffrances's support. It would take a lot of work before either of them was ready to accept that.

"Okay, I guess. But I want to protect her. And the more she gets used to dealing with things directly, the harder it will be for her to let go of that attitude so she can be little."

"Maybe. But that's her decision to make. I think another afternoon of regression might help, if she still wants to go down that path. I've been half expecting her to ask to celebrate Christmas as a little; that's one childish activity that I always wished was open to adults, even before you told me about this... interest. But she hasn't said anything, so perhaps waking up wet occasionally is all she wants."

"Or perhaps she's too embarrassed to admit what she really wants," I offered hopefully. It might not be so easy to convince Ffrances of that a second time if Tess didn't cooperate, but I still had a few more tricks up my sleeve. "She said she wanted to talk to you, right? Was that about reinforcing the suggestion?"

"She wants to change it," she said slowly. "She's embarrassed to tell me the details, but I think she might want to change the focus a little. Perhaps something less inconvenient than bedwetting, like talking to her toys. I'm not sure yet, but it reassures me that she's still enjoying the experience. I think I've only seen her ask for an accident twice, and it's been almost a month. Plus once she asked to not have an accident, of course, taking away her temptation. Perhaps she isn't enjoying it as much as she expected."