✅ My Cousin's Keeper [NaNoWriMo 2021]

76. My Surprise

Putting up Christmas decorations was a lot more fun with a little one in the house. I suggested to Tess that we could do it together, and she didn't object. She'd been pretty small when she woke up that morning, and cheerful for most of the day according to Ffrances. So it was no surprise that she was happy to carry on being a little girl later in the day. Not to mention that she'd spend much of the day packing a suitcase, and she was probably in need of a break by now. She was half dancing as we hung up coloured lights, streamers, and weird mobile things to hang all of out cards on. There were presents under the tree as well, all wrapped in bright paper. I didn't know what any of those were – probably Ffrances had wrapped them up and left them with all the decorations – but they made the house feel just a little more like a family lived here, rather than just a couple of young professionals.

The evening was a lot of fun, although it was even more tiring after a long day. But I was glad that we had a chance to do something fun together before she went away. I was just realising that in less than twenty-four hours, Tess would be on the train to the airport, if she hadn't already boarded a flight to San Lorenzo. I was going to miss her, and I couldn't help worrying. I could tell myself that by chronological age she was almost an adult, but that didn't give me any more confidence. I knew that the reason she needed to find her little headspace was that she was still a child on the inside, and she wouldn't have been able to function as an adult. And that meant that she should still be cared for, no matter how mature she claimed to be. She was my baby, and I didn't want to think what could happen to her when she struck out alone. But John told me not to worry, and I didn't want to upset her when things were going so well.

She was quite little when we were hanging decorations. She wasn't dressed like a child, but she didn't refuse a pacifier, and giggled excitedly when I offered praise on a job well done. And to thank her for that, I didn't complain when she tried going up the ladder by herself to reach a hook on the ceiling.

While we were working out the best place to hang childish decorations in the nursery, I sat down and paid attention to my phone for a few seconds. I sent Tess a message, checking that the contact on my XV address book was the right person. I had my doubts when her phone didn't vibrate immediately; but I'd read enough of the promotional literature to know that messages could be automatically delayed for five to ten minutes, because some psychologist had said it was less stressful that way. I didn't know the theory, no doubt Ffrances would talk my ear off if I asked her about it, but I was reassured a few minutes later when her phone vibrated. She smirked at me when she read the message, and I knew that I had a new way to contact her. One that would get her attention the moment she heard the sound, if her reaction was anything to go by. That would make everything easier.

The next vibration was from my phone. It was from Ffrances, who had gone to the supermarket to get tofu, milk, and pizza shortly before I got home. She said that there had been an accident because of ice on the road, and she wouldn't be back for another fifteen minutes. I told her not to worry, and sent her a picture of Tess putting the star on the Christmas tree. I wanted us to feel like a family, and brushing aside the little setbacks helped with that a lot. And I wanted to give her a reason to smile, when she was doing something that must have been stressful.

I sent Tess another message before I put my phone away. Testing out the features on this new messaging app, so I could see how she would respond.

"You won't have an accident tonight," I typed out. "You can be a big girl before your big trip."

Five minutes later her phone vibrated. She glanced at the screen, nodded, and put it back on the desk.

"Is that okay?" I asked, although I knew right away that I would have been better not asking.