"Get in the car," Yeji sternly muttered
Karina obeyed like a little child. Eversince she walked out the bathroom Yeji has been acting indifferent towards her
Adding to the fact that Yeonjun was quiet the whole morning around them when he should be pestering Yeji like he always do and Winter was nowhere to be found
What truly happened when she walked out on them?
She wanted to ask but she had no courage to do so.
All of a sudden, Yeji sped up with her deep eyes locked on the road. Her grip were tight and her body is tensed. She's furious.
"Y—yeji will you slow down?"
Karina started fidgeting, "Yeji! Slow down for goodness sake!"
Instead of listening Yeji accelerated twice the amount earlier
"Yeji stop the car! Now!" Karina yelled
But it's like the girl who's driving doesn't hear a thing. Not once did she slow down.
"Yeji, you're scaring me." Her voice trembled, she was frightened
Yeji was brought back into reality. Her back relaxed on her seat, she leisurely parked the car in the middle of the road.
"What the hell were you thinking?" Karina faced her
"I'm sorry,"
She sighed, "What's gotten into you? You've been acting strange."
"It's nothing. Let's get you to work." Yeji puts her hand on the gear when Karina stopped her by holding it in place
"What happened?" Karina eagerly asked
Yeji looked away clenching her teeth inside her mouth. She's beginning to get mad again.
"Winter." She mumbled
Karina leaned back. "What?"
"I confronted her about everything. I said some things I do not regret."
"Like what?"
Yeji kept quiet.
"Like what Yeji?" She asked under her breath
"Like how she doesn't deserve you." Yeji replied in a nonchalant manner
Karina was perplexed, "W—what?"
"I talked some sense into her, she doesn't deserve you Karina." Yeji pulled away from her grasp
"Why did you tell her that?"
"Because she's a horrible person," Yeji replied coldly
"Don't talk to her that way!" Karina reprimanded
"I knew it." Yeji scoffed, she looked away
"I knew you love her and I honestly thought you're nearly getting over her, I thought wrong." She forced a chuckle
Karina's eyes slowly fell on the ground. She tightly sealed her lips.
"It was over way before it actually started, right? I knew from the beginning that I had already lost and yet I still tried," Yeji inhaled deeply
Karina wanted to hold her, she wanted to comfort her but she'd lie if she tells her she's wrong.
"It hurts." Yeji says quietly. "I'm pouring my best self into you and still being the second choice, and maybe not even that?"
Karina cupped her cheeks to make them look at her.
Yeji looked into her beautiful feline eyes. A tear trickled down her cheek because she knew they would never look at her the way they look at Winter.
"I'm so sorry, Yeji." That's all Karina can say. She didn't want to hurt her but she did anyways.
"We were almost together." Yeji mused, "and I think that it hurts more because of that."
She heaved a deep sigh.
"I was almost good enough for you, but not quite. You almost loved me, but somehow it all got screwed up. And it just hurts that we were so, so close to the finish line but we never made it across." Her face twitched out of pain
"I love you." She whispered painfully, "But I don't think you feel the same. Do you?"
There's a long silence, and Karina appears to be hesitant about it.
"I'm sure," Yeji gulped continuously, her tone carefully measured so it doesn't crack. "I'm sure that if you have to think about it, you don't. So I believe we're both wasting our time here."
"I need to let go." She sighed
"Everyone's telling me to, and I know deep down that I should, but I can't. I can't, because what if you change your mind?" She shook her head and looked up to keep from crying
"Now don't make it hard for me anymore, Karina. I need you to choose, say it. Eventhough I knew from the start, just say it. Tell me that you're choosing her over me so I can finally move on."
Karina started crying as well, her hands on Yeji's cheeks slowly losing its strength.
"Yeji..."
"I'll still be here... as a friend." Yeji bit her lower lip to stifle a sob
"I'm sorry, I'm really sorry."
"Say it, Karina."
"I'm sorry, I choose her." She whispered
And it is then when Yeji finally realize that she deserve better.
She felt weak. She clenched her fist while holding the steering wheel. Yeji poured all her tears out, and she couldn't look at Karina anymore.
She started the engine of the car and drove away. She dropped off Karina to her work without saying anything.
She's not mad at her nor does she hate her. She just needs a little time to fix herself.
Yeji wish she could rid of herself of the parts of her that beg for understanding. The parts of her that beg for an answer to the question, why did you choose her over me? Because there is no real answer. It was never about her.
There were so many things she still wanted to say; how they could have worked it out, how she could have been better, how she could have been the one if Karina let her. But what's the use in trying to reassure someone in something when they're inlove with somebody else?
There was nothing in the world she could have done to make Karina stay. There were no other words she could have said to make Karina choose her.
She wanted it to be Karina. She really did. It was ironic how her heart can still get hurt by something she already saw coming.
And she knew the pain she feels right now is only the beginning of torture
YOU ARE READING
Miss Pessimistic | winrina/jiminjeong
Fanfiction"Please, just this once... tell me you love me." Deep down we both knew it would only lead to pain... but we still got carried away. We risked everything even ourselves, it was getting destructive. Right then, I knew what we had to do, and that is t...
