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A/n. How do we all feel about the Lucia letters at the beginning? I've kinda revolved the whole structure of my chapters around them so I hope we all like it :)

Understandably lost a few readers after leaving you hanging for six months but i could kiss those of you who stayed, thanks huns🤍🤍🤍

Understandably lost a few readers after leaving you hanging for six months but i could kiss those of you who stayed, thanks huns🤍🤍🤍

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Hello bump.

I'm actually quite in love with my little swell.

I now understand how mothers always seem to be holding theirs and rubbing it constantly.

It used to irritate me when I'd see it.

Like, we get it lady you're pregnant, no I'm not giving up my seat on the bus for you.

But turns out it's just an instinct.

It's more like, hey look at this pot belly I suddenly have that wasn't there a few month back, I feel the need to touch it.

Pros of this screwed up situation I'm in; I don't have to waste my time and money finding maternity clothes to fit my growing body.

I can waltz around my secluded countryside place fully embracing my naked bump in nothing but my lacey fucking thongs.

Sexy image, am I right Kian?

I mean seriously, I couldn't even tell you where any of my nonna knickers are because I haven't had a period in weeks.

First trimester sickness? I don't remember her.

Being pregnant is my calling.

Laying around watching Netflix and ordering takeaway after takeaway? Running from home to live on my own? Embracing my inner beach whale and living in cropped tops?

Knock me the fuck up.

Cons; opening the door to the pizza guy and scarring him for life forgetting your half dressed.

Needless to say I order from a different pizza place now.

As for actual productive news, my pregnancy app says the baby is around the size of an apple at 15 weeks.

Oh, and three more weeks 'til I'm scheduled to find out the gender.

Just casually dropping that in there.

Nothing to worry about. I'm totally cool and prepared.

-your favourite chillaxed beach whale.

"Oh je- fucking hell Kian, she was gorgeous. How didn't you remember banging that." Kelly gasps, practically drooling over the one photo of Lucia Kian has showed her.

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